Teens and Stress

[Juicybearfut]

While i was up finishing my paper last night at like 1 in the morning...i had an idea for this topic...

what do u think about the amount of stress that teenagers face? has it always been this high or has is escalated in recent years and why? what are your opinions?

my opinion: i think teens have to face more stress and pressure then before. Now, all that matters is getting into college to parents, and the put more pressure on their kids to do well. "Ok" grades are no longer enough to get in. You need to take good courses, do well in them, and do tons of extracurricular activities. suicide is now the 3rd leading cause of death among teenagers, and i think stress has a big part to play.

[Insidious Rex]

Well I think teens have always had to deal with stress. In fact you can argue more so in the past then now. a lot of people would say kids have it pretty darn easy now. but that may be the very crux of the problem. every generation has been more and more of a navel gazing generation because of technical developments (we no longer have to plow the fields or go to work at 10) and because of a change in how we view things socially. We have more of a leniant open culture now which exposes teens to more stuff then ever before and that can be overwelming. not to mention the activity levels of kids now, even little kids, is unreal. hockey practice. band practice. homework. plays. organized sports. clubs. etc. etc. When do you guys have time to just go out and climb a tree or kick a can! oh wait, i forgot, even if you did your parents wouldnt let you for fear youd get hurt or kidnapped. Yes I do feel sorry for you guys sometimes...

[Nurvingiel]

I think that you're right about academics Juicybearfut. There's other causes stress too including bullying, but I'll just comment on academics.

It is getting more difficult to get into university, and consequently there is more pressure on teens. And, once you're in university, it gets even worse! Now, this does not trivialize what teens face in the slightest. Far from it.

When you're in secondary school, I think there should be less of an insistence on academic excellence - you have more important things to learn like music, sports, the complexities of social interaction, shop, your own identity, art, drama, writing, etc. Leave the mental horrors for university where it's more appropriate.

It's worth noting that both my brother and I chose our intended future careers from activities we undertook outside of school. There is an attempt to convince young people that they need to decide their careers while they're still in school. Not only is this a very silly idea, but it also adds even more pressure! (I recall a course called Career and Personal Planning we had to take that was a complete waste of time.)

My advice, such as it is, is to not worry about your career, and study whatever interests you most. University is important and useful in itself, not just to vault you into some high paying job.


Education is not a means to an end. It is an end in itself.
- Robert Heinlein

[Juicybearfut]

Originally Posted by Nurvingiel

I

When you're in secondary school, I think there should be less of an insistence on academic excellence - you have more important things to learn like music, sports, the complexities of social interaction, shop, your own identity, art, drama, writing, etc. Leave the mental horrors for university where it's more appropriate.

i think that seconday school is high school...but anyways.....i mean, i dont have time to focus on other things besides academics,..i do a sport every season and take 4 honors/ap classes and i only have a half-year free ebcause this year i wanted to do something that really interests me like videography, which i love, but i willl not have enough time in my schdeual to take advanced video. We're pikcing courses for enxt year....and AGAIN i only have a half year free because i really want to take animal behavior.....
i just dont have time to focus on other things out of school like climbing trees or such and being outside like i used too, and i think thats why our generation is missing out on the things in life that arent school related.....

yea sorry i just kinda went off in a tangent about school.....5 hours of sleep for the past 2 nites can do that to you

[Millane]

the end of my secondary schooling years was cushy as... I did no sports or "extracurriculars", the school i went to said you had to do at least two we occasionally turned up on a wednesday arvo to play table tennis if we were particularly bored but thats about it... Exams were a bit stressful but nothing too horrid and they're always bad anyway.
I didnt really bother about school that much and i still got into the course i wanted to do...
Now ive got the year off before uni and im just gunna bum around, work here and there and travel...
very cushy life indeed

[Nurvingiel]

Secondary school and high school are equivelant to each other, it just depends what country you live in.

It's totally fair to focus mostly on academics, I did too in high school. But my point was people should be allowed to put their attention elsewhere (such as Millane ) if they want.

[Count Comfect]

I think the problem is that, while, as IR said "you can argue more so in the past then now. a lot of people would say kids have it pretty darn easy now," the things that are "easier" are things like not having menial tasks, or not having to get up at dawn (although I used to get up before dawn back in high school). But the things that are harder are things that are higher stress - getting into a good college, getting good grades, having time for extracurriculars, and all that jazz. So while the physical workload may be easier, the stress level is actually higher.

And I definitely think that said stress level should be lower. For a start, we should get rid of grade inflation so that you don't have to (as people at my high school did) get nearly straight As just to keep up with everyone else. If a C were a more acceptable grade, societally, then I think that stress levels would start to drop.

[Nurvingiel]

Well I don't think it's that bad CC. Unless you live in Japan.

[Count Comfect]

Actually, I read somewhere that on average, our kids do more work per week than Japanese students now, although they have fewer hours of school.

And it is heading in that direction, especially with high-stakes testing nowadays. Although I'll concede it probably isn't there yet.

[Sister Golden Hair]

Well I think in some ways, at least here in Ohio, it has been made too easy for students to get through High School and into college, and frankly it, IMO is unfair. Here if you drop out of high school or are withdrawn for lack of attendance or bad grades, there are a number of alternative schools you may attend and recieve your high school diploma. One such school is called "The Overage School." This school allows you to get the credits you needed and you may take up to your 21st birthday to do so, at which time you are issued your high school diploma (not a GED) which is the same diploma you would have received had you graduated and walked across the stage with your class that did it right in the first place. Now, how stressful is that, or fair?

Also here in Ohio, you have to pass what is called the ninth grade proficiency test. You begin taking it in 8th grade. It consists of 5 parts (math English, science, writing, and history). It is given twice a year. Whatever parts you didn't pass, you will continue taking the test until you do. You have through 12th grade to pass all 5 parts. You must pass all 5 parts of the 9th grade test in order to graduate.. Stressful?

I wish school was that stressful when I was going. If you didn't graduate then, the best you could hope for was a GED.

I do believe though that stress is and always has been a problem with teens, but its causes are from many different things, not any one thing.

[Count Comfect]

I wish school was that stressful when I was going. If you didn't graduate then, the best you could hope for was a GED.

As far as I am aware, in my state that is still the case - it seems like Ohio is a lot more lax than Washington in that regard. The same goes for our test - you take it in 10th grade and there are very minimal ways of making it up. So here at least, there is a lot of stress with college and HS.

But of course you are right, there is not one sole cause of stress. It would be nice if there were, we could get rid of it

[Snowdog]

A little off the subject but wholluy under the topic title...

My 16 year old son causes way too much stress in me. I get home from work yesterday and the sheriff's deputies are at the house. Why? Because he goes off and starts breaking abd destroying things and scares his 15 year old sister and mom to death. He is a big kid, and its only his fear of me that keeps him in check. "child abuse" issues aside, I will kick his butt to protect the rest of the family from him.

[Sister Golden Hair]

Originally Posted by Snowdog

A little off the subject but wholluy under the topic title...

My 16 year old son causes way too much stress in me. I get home from work yesterday and the sheriff's deputies are at the house. Why? Because he goes off and starts breaking abd destroying things and scares his 15 year old sister and mom to death. He is a big kid, and its only his fear of me that keeps him in check. "child abuse" issues aside, I will kick his butt to protect the rest of the family from him.

I feel your pain Snowdog, seeing as how I have raised a son who is now 22, but believe me, I had my share of stress with him in his teen years and even since. Part of parenthood, huh?

I think you bring up a good point though about child abuse. There's a difference between dicipline and abuse. I think though that such a fine line has been drawn by child specialists, medical authorities and law enforcement, removing things such as corpral punishment in schools and so forth that dicipline has all but disappeared. This causes stress on parents who now fear to dicipline their children and in turn that stress can be transfered over to the teen because a rift occurs in the relationship. I think it possibly may send the wrong message as well to some kids which allows them to attempt more defiance toward parents and law enforcement, leading them down a road to trouble at home, in school, and perhaps going as far as becoming involved in criminal activity. This is stressful for everyone involved.

[Nurvingiel]

I'm not sure what you're implying SGH... do you want corporal punishment back in schools?

IMO, parents should be allowed to discipline their kids, physically if necessary, but if my kid's teacher hit my kid, I'd kick their ass!

[Snowdog]

Actually there is alot to be said about corporal punishment in schools too. I got in on the end of that routine, and my 7th & 8th grade wood shop teacher had a mohogany board with a handle and holes drilled into it to cut down wind resistance, and yes, it was a deterrent to many. Was it ever used? Exactly once in two years in my classes.

But that becomes a different subject at this point. Getting back to my deviation of the purpose of this thread, I had to use physical force exactly once on him, and now he does not push his limit with me because he knows I am serious. Still, the stress caused by teens are enormous.

[inked]

Snowdog,

Are you familiar with the line, "Insanity is hereditary; you get it from your teenagers?"

[Snowdog]

I have heard that!

[Juicybearfut]

i dont beleive in corpral punishment at home and school at all.

if my dad ever hit me i would just walk out of his house and would stay at my moms for a long time. Parents and Teens need to learn how to deal with each other by TALKING and forming respectful relationships that go BOTH WAYS so both parties can get what they want or at least compromise on most issues. Since parents are the first people that kids form personally relationships with, it is important that kids know how to make them verbally because in the real world, you cant smack anyone who doesnt listen to you.

[Juicybearfut]

Originally Posted by Snowdog

Still, the stress caused by teens are enormous.

dont you think the stress goes both ways?

[Sister Golden Hair]

Originally Posted by Juicybearfut

i dont beleive in corpral punishment at home and school at all.

if my dad ever hit me i would just walk out of his house and would stay at my moms for a long time. Parents and Teens need to learn how to deal with each other by TALKING and forming respectful relationships that go BOTH WAYS so both parties can get what they want or at least compromise on most issues. Since parents are the first people that kids form personally relationships with, it is important that kids know how to make them verbally because in the real world, you cant smack anyone who doesnt listen to you.

Let me just say that corporal punishment in school was used more as a detourant than actuallyput to use, although there were exceptions. Also in my experience corporal punishment isn't effective with teens, but more so with smaller children. I think it's great if parents and children can form respectful relationships, but there will always be times where there will be friction. Parents are responsible for there children and sometimes telling children that they can't do this or that causes problems. I believe in trying to have good relations with you children, but you are their parents, not their friends.

dont you think the stress goes both ways?

Of course it goes both ways, but as I said earlier, teen stress is due to many things. For parents, one of the biggest causes of stress is their children.