Comedy Club

[Tessar]

I think we could all use a laugh.

This is the place to share your best jokes, internet videos, funny stories, and other miscellaneous things. I know we have used the Teacup Cafe for this sort of thing in the past, but I think it's high time we had a dedicated funny thread.

Please keep the content PG-13, so nothing too explicit.

[Tessar]

A lot of Katherine Tate's stuff is pretty inappropriate, but this is one of her funny, clean videos. It's about a clueless Information Desk woman. My parents absolutely died when I showed this to them.


Katherine Tate: Information Desk Woman

[Mari]

For everyone who has had trouble with the modern devices: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kAG39jKi0lI

[GrayMouser]

Been heavily into The Walking Dead recently, and came up with this little zombie-related post.

WARNING- no sex, but some entrails:



Lifeism- Prejudices Against the Undead: A Survey:

Social/cultural Attitudes Toward the Undead in View of Recent Increases of Contacts Between the Living and the Dead (popularly known as the "Zombie Apocalypse")

Racism, sexism, ageism, heightism, lookism- there are many forms of discrimination in our society, but one of the most prevalent is lifeism: bigotry towards some of our fellow citizens simply because their brains have ceased to function and they constantly try to rip our intestines out and eat them. Shockingly, this form of prejudice is widespread even in the 21st Century, and may even have intensified as shambling hordes of the Undead* spread out from the cities and move into our neighborhoods.

Please take the test below to examine your own feelings.

* A note on terminology: While some people feel the term "Undead" unduly privileges the dominant classes of our society - 'the living' and the (tellingly) ' "really" dead' -by classifying the ( Un)dead's very existence as a negative, we feel the term is sufficiently value-free and widely-known to be useful. The preferred politically-correct term is 'a post-living person' .

Recently the term "Walker" has been introduced, most notably in the widely-watched documentary series "The Walking Dead", which examines the tensions and conflicts which arise when a group of 'live' people are forced to confront their own prejudices when dealing with the changes introduced in their lifestyles by contact with the Undead. While we laud this attempt to avoid the "Z-word", we would not use the term because

a) it may be construed as prejudicial, implying the Undead are incapable of other forms of mobility
b ) it excludes those members of the post-living community who had their legs chewed off by their fellows before their revival.

We note it is a sign of changing standards that, during this entire two-year documentary serial, not even the most hostile member of the living group was willing to use the word "z*****s"- at least not on-camera!

On to the test:

1) Please select the answer that best reflects your own opinion

a ) Prejudice against the post-living is a real problem in our society.
b )Some of my best friends are dead, but I wouldn't want my sister to marry one.
c )They're fine as long as they stick to their own kind and don't try to move into our neighborhood and eat us.
d ) ARE YOU GUYS NUTS?!?! These are hideous rotting cannibalistic ghouls whose only aim is to devour us alive, so they should have the same rights as everybody else, but no special privileges.
e ) ARRRGGGNNNNNUUUOOooowwoaaa

(If you chose answer 'e' above, DO NOT return your completed questionnaire in person.)

2) Have you had personal contact with a member of the Undead community?
a )Yes b )No

3) If you answered "Yes" to the above question, did you survive?
a ) Yes b )arrrugggnnnrrrrr

4) Did this experience have a negative impact on the way you view other members of the Undead community?

a ) Yes, I'm a bigoted jerk
b ) No, I understand that discrimination and lack of economic opportunity has led them to have no choice to survive but to try and chew my face off

5)Have you ever participated in an Undead community activity, such as walking aimlessly around in circles going "unnnnnrrrrrggg"?

a ) Yes b ) No

6) If 'Yes', did you drape yourself with the intestines of the living to blend in with the crowd?

a ) Yes b ) No, no, Oh God, NOOOOO!!


7) Have you ever partaken of traditional Undead cuisine?

a ) Yes b ) No

8) If 'Yes', was it anybody you knew?

9) Describe your reaction to their style of food

a ) Human sashimi -yum!
b )tastes like chicken
c ) I'm a Vegan- I only eat people from Vegas.
d ) Ohmigod, that's Aunt Elsie!!!

10) What would your reaction be if a child of the post-living community was to enroll at your child's school?

a ) I'd encourage my child to sit with them at recess and share a snack
b ) I'd encourage my child to sit with them at recess and be a snack
c ) I'd encourage my child to get "Dibs" on the baseball bat at recess and swing at anything that came too close.

11) If an Undead family were to move in next-door, how would you react?

a )Barricade myself in the basement with plenty of guns and ammo
b ) Send my spouse and children over to welcome them to the neighborhood
c ) Send my spouse and children over to welcome them to the neighborhood, then barricade myself in the basement with plenty of guns and ammo, figuring that would fill them up for a few days.

12) If you came across a migrating herd of the Undead blocking the highway, what would your reaction be?

a ) Reflect on the benefits of living in a multi-cultural society in which all people, living and dead, have the freedom to celebrate their own customs.
b ) "Get off the road, you brain-dead ghouls"
c ) "Quick! Roll up the windo-AAAAGHH!!
d ) "Yee-Ha! Get on the 50-caliber, Darryl- we're going through!"

Thank you for taking part in this test. Feel free to add any questions of your own.

Follow-up:

Would you be willing to have a member of the Association for the Advancement of Undead Groups (AAUG!!!) come to your house to do some follow-up?
a ) Sure
b ) Get off my porch, you brain-eating cannibalistic ghoul- BLAM! BLAM!
c ) No, but I'm sure my neighbor with the noisy stereo would be glad to- here's his address.

[The Gaffer]

Well, this made me laugh out loud:

http://www.scotsman.com/news/odd/loc...myth-1-2373903

I am afraid that it isn't a joke though.

[Earniel]

Well, the story might be real, but the type of 'education' it talks about really is a joke if you ask me.

I'd laugh if it wasn't so sad.

[Tessar]

From "That Mitchell and Webb Look," I bring you "Coverage Of People Building A House And Then Living In It."

http://youtu.be/9CrLTwpJlBA




"Will Jeff be able to buy the house that's fine of his dreams? Yes he will. It's in budget. That was not a close one."

[Rían]

Originally Posted by Tessar

A lot of Katherine Tate's stuff is pretty inappropriate, but this is one of her funny, clean videos. It's about a clueless Information Desk woman. My parents absolutely died when I showed this to them.


Katherine Tate: Information Desk Woman

Fun! Reminds me of that airline ticketing agent "Meet the Parents" that asks a simple question like "do you have a carry-one?" and then gets a yes/no answer, and then types and types and TYPES and TYPES when it should only be one little check-box! And then the other airline agent that wouldn't let him board because it wasn't his row yet, even though there was no one else in the waiting area! here

[Lotesse]

Everything Louis CK. His stand-up (any/all of it,) his latest television show Louie, and his old HBO show Lucky Louie; all of it & everything he does pretty much rocks, extremely.

I wish I could link you to a few things but I haven't had my own computer in aaaages. This is my bf's laptop & don't laugh (too heartily) at me but I'm still not sure how to navigate between open windows (it's a macbook air), and stuff like that. Plus he's coming back soon, and will want to wrest the computer away from me again.

Look- Just Google with the search terms "Youtube Louis CK" and you'll get some pretty awesome stuff. And George Carlin, too, while you're at it.

[Lotesse]

This is a really cool thread idea, by the way. When I finally figure out how to quickly post links AND have the time requisite on this laptop to be able to do so, I'll definitely contribute more. Thanks for the great idea, Tessar!! *KISSES*

[The Gaffer]

Agreed

David Mitchell is some kind of minor genius. One for those who are sick to death of "all the football, all the time, forever" on the telly.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0wCz7NelwfU

[Tessar]

I love David Mitchell! Have you seen his five minute rants? It was part of a promotion he did for some shaving cream or something. It was very funny... I think it was David Mitchell's Soap Box.

[Rían]

For some reason, this clip of the reeeeely long area code from the Zohan movie just busts me up! I guess we've all been so irritated by putting long numbers into beeping little phones ...

[Mari]

This is funny: http://www.youtube.com/profile?annot...tippexperience

[Rían]

I love funny country song titles, like:

"I Still Miss You Baby, But My Aim's Gettin' Better"

[Lotesse]

Here, you guys, a little taste of Louis CK doing stand-up, talking about kids & parenting. PRICELESS! If you don't count his creative & liberal use of the ol' F- and Sh- swear words, then it's perfectly PG-13.

*mischievous grin*

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rcnXpOygKGI

[Lotesse]

Originally Posted by Mari

For everyone who has had trouble with the modern devices: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kAG39jKi0lI

This was a good one, got me actually laughing aloud! thanx, Mari!