"Instant" Poetry (writing exercise) - Page 4

inked · 02-02-2005, 12:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rosie Gamgee

Ha! I like it. I think that's been happening to me lately- turning green from lack of fresh air.

Thanks. I'm glad the anaolgy was understood, despite the fact that I never exactly mentioned that the knife represented words and the wounds their effects.

Then, RG, we can tell what a poet means! (See the ALT thread

).

Rosie Gamgee · 02-02-2005, 01:04 PM

LOL!!! Yeah, but in this case you've got the poet here to tell you whether you're wrong or not.

***Tessar*** · 02-02-2005, 03:23 PM

Passing by the shore one day,
By happenschance I did so stray,
To walk along a rocky bay,
Where it's said mermaids dance and play.

Drawing near I saw a sight,
Which to some might be a fright,
And lead them to a hurried flight,
But I walked on in calm respite.

What I saw no man shall know,
For I know how his thoughts would flow!
For man's brain is but flashy show,
A'fixed 'twixt mud and snow!

To tell a woman would not be wise,
For she would laugh and roll her eyes,
Because though her wisdom she might prize,
Her and Man's brain are both the same size!

And so the sight that I did see,
Shall be known only to me,
And though my thoughts some might try to free,
I shall remain firm as the oak tree!

Rosie Gamgee · 02-09-2005, 11:18 AM

Neat! (That was 'instant'?) Good rhyme!

I shove a hat down on my head
The mirror is my enemy
This is my constant dread
That I or someone else should see me

Oh, tape it back on
Use a hot glue-gun if you must--
But it is all gone
I suppose this is just

I love the internet
Isn't it great?
With you I do not have to fret
You cannot see my state

If all people were so kind
To listen, only hear
How I wish that all were blind
But I won't shed a tear

It grows, it grows!
That's my theme
It'll grow- it grows!
But I see it in my dreams

Beruthiel's cat · 02-09-2005, 11:51 AM

A bad hair day
Will go away
If given enough time.

A bad hair cut
Becomes the butt
Of poetry and rhyme.

Imagine, if you will, a day
You do not have to dread
Your comb, your brush
Or any such
Device upon your head.

This I vow
Right here and now...
To say a little prayer
That Rosie soon
Will change her tune
And grow into her hair.

(Sorry Rosie!! I know a bad haircut can be traumatic. I once had a perm which literally burned much of my hair down to my scalp. It came out in clumps for a week!! Awful!!!)

Rosie Gamgee · 02-09-2005, 12:24 PM

lol. Thanks. I like the poem.

So, how did you go about sueing the hairdresser?

Last Child of Ungoliant · 04-07-2005, 06:12 AM

A Wall of Blood
by Chrys M Dawson

Peering through the wall of blood,
The eyes pierced my heart,
Journey to my soul,
But don't cut me anymore.

Lotesse · 05-02-2005, 06:02 PM

i need love
i need love
like magicians need a glove
fitted 'round my frozen heart
like a soft
warm
dove.
i need love.

Julia · 05-18-2005, 11:02 PM

I'm kindof an amateur but anyway

...u guys know anything that rhymes with beetle

..its stupid i know. i just had a thought

Lotesse · 05-19-2005, 12:11 AM

Hi, welcome Julia!
Here's a useful website to find words you might want to rhyme:
http://www.rhymer.com/

Syle · 05-24-2005, 06:07 PM

Pain-shaken fingernails
claw at an impossible escape
they fall, defeated.

Church bells scream out their death symphony
a ballad for those mourning.

A glimspe
in a tear-stricken eye
of a grey with death
thin knuckle.

Not my best work, but, hey, it's instant. Much like coffee.

Lotesse · 05-24-2005, 06:10 PM

That's a cool little poem, Syle but why do you type it so small? I could barely see it.

Last Child of Ungoliant · 05-24-2005, 06:21 PM

drips through the paper
drips to the floor
washes away the fears
sleep eternal
but never to hear
lifeblood

Last Child of Ungoliant · 05-24-2005, 06:41 PM

taken
cradle to grave
taken through it all
eternally passing
instigating
taking all
only to end
taken

Beruthiel's cat · 05-24-2005, 08:27 PM

Chrys, both poems are very good -- moody, almost brooding. The second one is particularly good. The construction and flow are great, especially for something off the cuff. Writing is a great outlet, isn't it?

Last Child of Ungoliant · 05-24-2005, 08:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Beruthiel's cat

Chrys, both poems are very good -- moody, almost brooding. The second one is particularly good. The construction and flow are great, especially for something off the cuff. Writing is a great outlet, isn't it?

thankees BC, glad you like, i love writing, nearly as much as meditating

Last Child of Ungoliant · 05-24-2005, 08:46 PM

bricks of lives
building stories
passing time
flowing onward

ever fleeting
never fleeing
always moving
ever changing

Rosie Gamgee · 05-25-2005, 11:15 AM

smile for me
you hypocrites.

your love is shallow;
you laugh.

take your frowns and turn them inside out
save it for youself.

take your laughing and leave me be.

but only smile for me
and I will be happy.

hectorberlioz · 05-25-2005, 05:18 PM

Don't dare look at me,
my dear little friend,
for to prison I will send thee,
for your life to mend.

Trifling tiny roaches,
race about the floor,
in your dungeon they poaches,
and crawls through the door.

Soon you'll be out,
and will go about your bussiness,
Unless you I clout,
and your head spins with dizziness.

You'll run and I'll pursue,
through a mob of angry men,
fighting for country O so True;
Soon after you'll find a pen,
not of writing but of pigs,
and then I'll force you,
to do a little jig.

Jigging can be so much fun,
If you take the time,
and you my friend, my son,
will do it for your crimes.

Last Child of Ungoliant · 05-30-2005, 08:57 PM

feelings
brought to the surface
shying
scared of unknown

taking
time to sink back
feelings
now are passing

02-02-2005, 01:04 PM	#62
Rosie Gamgee The Lovely Hobbit-Lass Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: Bounded in a nut-shell Posts: 1,593	LOL!!! Yeah, but in this case you've got the poet here to tell you whether you're wrong or not. __________________ It's New Years Day, just like the day before; Same old skies of grey, same empty bottles on the floor. Another year's gone by, and I was thinking once again, How can I take this losing hand and somehow win? Just give me One Good Year To get my feet back on the ground. I've been chasing grace; Grace ain't so easily found One bad hand can devil a man, chase him and carry him down. I've got to get out of here, just give me One Good Year!

02-09-2005, 11:18 AM	#64
Rosie Gamgee The Lovely Hobbit-Lass Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: Bounded in a nut-shell Posts: 1,593	Neat! (That was 'instant'?) Good rhyme! I shove a hat down on my head The mirror is my enemy This is my constant dread That I or someone else should see me Oh, tape it back on Use a hot glue-gun if you must-- But it is all gone I suppose this is just I love the internet Isn't it great? With you I do not have to fret You cannot see my state If all people were so kind To listen, only hear How I wish that all were blind But I won't shed a tear It grows, it grows! That's my theme It'll grow- it grows! But I see it in my dreams __________________ It's New Years Day, just like the day before; Same old skies of grey, same empty bottles on the floor. Another year's gone by, and I was thinking once again, How can I take this losing hand and somehow win? Just give me One Good Year To get my feet back on the ground. I've been chasing grace; Grace ain't so easily found One bad hand can devil a man, chase him and carry him down. I've got to get out of here, just give me One Good Year!

02-09-2005, 11:51 AM	#65
Beruthiel's cat mystical divinity of Unashamed Felinity Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: New York's beautiful North Coast -- we're all mad here!!! Posts: 635	A bad hair day Will go away If given enough time. A bad hair cut Becomes the butt Of poetry and rhyme. Imagine, if you will, a day You do not have to dread Your comb, your brush Or any such Device upon your head. This I vow Right here and now... To say a little prayer That Rosie soon Will change her tune And grow into her hair. (Sorry Rosie!! I know a bad haircut can be traumatic. I once had a perm which literally burned much of my hair down to my scalp. It came out in clumps for a week!! Awful!!!) __________________ "Never try to out-stubborn a cat!" -- R. Heinlein ~~~~~~~~~ "But I don't want to be among mad people, " Alice remarked. "Oh, but you can't help that," said the Cat; "We're all mad here. I'm mad. You're mad." "How do you know I'm mad?" said Alice. "You must be," said the Cat, "or you wouldn't have come here." ~~ Lewis Carroll ~~~~~~~~~~~ Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana...

02-09-2005, 12:24 PM	#66
Rosie Gamgee The Lovely Hobbit-Lass Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: Bounded in a nut-shell Posts: 1,593	lol. Thanks. I like the poem. So, how did you go about sueing the hairdresser? __________________ It's New Years Day, just like the day before; Same old skies of grey, same empty bottles on the floor. Another year's gone by, and I was thinking once again, How can I take this losing hand and somehow win? Just give me One Good Year To get my feet back on the ground. I've been chasing grace; Grace ain't so easily found One bad hand can devil a man, chase him and carry him down. I've got to get out of here, just give me One Good Year!

05-02-2005, 06:02 PM	#68
Lotesse of the House of Fëanor Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Los Angeles Posts: 6,150	i need love i need love like magicians need a glove fitted 'round my frozen heart like a soft warm dove. i need love. __________________ Few people have the imagination for reality. ~Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

02-02-2005, 03:23 PM	#63
*Tessar* Master and Wielder of the Cardboard Harp of Gondor Join Date: Sep 2001 Location: IM IN UR POSTZ, EDITIN' UR WURDZ Posts: 6,433	Passing by the shore one day, By happenschance I did so stray, To walk along a rocky bay, Where it's said mermaids dance and play. Drawing near I saw a sight, Which to some might be a fright, And lead them to a hurried flight, But I walked on in calm respite. What I saw no man shall know, For I know how his thoughts would flow! For man's brain is but flashy show, A'fixed 'twixt mud and snow! To tell a woman would not be wise, For she would laugh and roll her eyes, Because though her wisdom she might prize, Her and Man's brain are both the same size! And so the sight that I did see, Shall be known only to me, And though my thoughts some might try to free, I shall remain firm as the oak tree!

04-07-2005, 06:12 AM	#67
Last Child of Ungoliant The Intermittent One Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: here and there Posts: 4,671	A Wall of Blood by Chrys M Dawson Peering through the wall of blood, The eyes pierced my heart, Journey to my soul, But don't cut me anymore.

05-18-2005, 11:02 PM	#69
Julia Sapling Join Date: May 2005 Location: Puerto Rico Posts: 1	hey! I'm kindof an amateur but anyway ...u guys know anything that rhymes with beetle ..its stupid i know. i just had a thought

05-19-2005, 12:11 AM	#70
Lotesse of the House of Fëanor Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Los Angeles Posts: 6,150	Hi, welcome Julia! Here's a useful website to find words you might want to rhyme: http://www.rhymer.com/ __________________ Few people have the imagination for reality. ~Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

05-24-2005, 06:07 PM	#71
Syle Sapling Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Tennessee Posts: 6	Pain-shaken fingernails claw at an impossible escape they fall, defeated. Church bells scream out their death symphony a ballad for those mourning. A glimspe in a tear-stricken eye of a grey with death thin knuckle. Not my best work, but, hey, it's instant. Much like coffee. __________________ Nothing is certain, except everything you know can change, Worship the sun, but now can you fall for the rain? Jamie Cullum, "London Skies"

05-24-2005, 06:10 PM	#72
Lotesse of the House of Fëanor Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Los Angeles Posts: 6,150	That's a cool little poem, Syle but why do you type it so small? I could barely see it. __________________ Few people have the imagination for reality. ~Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

05-24-2005, 06:21 PM	#73
Last Child of Ungoliant The Intermittent One Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: here and there Posts: 4,671	drips through the paper drips to the floor washes away the fears sleep eternal but never to hear lifeblood

05-24-2005, 06:41 PM	#74
Last Child of Ungoliant The Intermittent One Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: here and there Posts: 4,671	taken cradle to grave taken through it all eternally passing instigating taking all only to end taken

05-24-2005, 08:27 PM	#75
Beruthiel's cat mystical divinity of Unashamed Felinity Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: New York's beautiful North Coast -- we're all mad here!!! Posts: 635	Chrys, both poems are very good -- moody, almost brooding. The second one is particularly good. The construction and flow are great, especially for something off the cuff. Writing is a great outlet, isn't it? __________________ "Never try to out-stubborn a cat!" -- R. Heinlein ~~~~~~~~~ "But I don't want to be among mad people, " Alice remarked. "Oh, but you can't help that," said the Cat; "We're all mad here. I'm mad. You're mad." "How do you know I'm mad?" said Alice. "You must be," said the Cat, "or you wouldn't have come here." ~~ Lewis Carroll ~~~~~~~~~~~ Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana...

05-24-2005, 08:46 PM	#77
Last Child of Ungoliant The Intermittent One Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: here and there Posts: 4,671	bricks of lives building stories passing time flowing onward ever fleeting never fleeing always moving ever changing

05-25-2005, 11:15 AM	#78
Rosie Gamgee The Lovely Hobbit-Lass Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: Bounded in a nut-shell Posts: 1,593	smile for me you hypocrites. your love is shallow; you laugh. take your frowns and turn them inside out save it for youself. take your laughing and leave me be. but only smile for me and I will be happy. __________________ It's New Years Day, just like the day before; Same old skies of grey, same empty bottles on the floor. Another year's gone by, and I was thinking once again, How can I take this losing hand and somehow win? Just give me One Good Year To get my feet back on the ground. I've been chasing grace; Grace ain't so easily found One bad hand can devil a man, chase him and carry him down. I've got to get out of here, just give me One Good Year!

05-25-2005, 05:18 PM	#79
hectorberlioz Master of Orchestration President Emeritus of Entmoot 2004-2008 Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: Lost in the Opera House Posts: 9,328	Don't dare look at me, my dear little friend, for to prison I will send thee, for your life to mend. Trifling tiny roaches, race about the floor, in your dungeon they poaches, and crawls through the door. Soon you'll be out, and will go about your bussiness, Unless you I clout, and your head spins with dizziness. You'll run and I'll pursue, through a mob of angry men, fighting for country O so True; Soon after you'll find a pen, not of writing but of pigs, and then I'll force you, to do a little jig. Jigging can be so much fun, If you take the time, and you my friend, my son, will do it for your crimes. __________________ ACALEWIA- President of Entmoot hectorberlioz- Vice President of Entmoot Acaly und Hektor fur Presidants fur EntMut fur life! Join the discussion at Entmoot Election 2010. "Stupidissimo!"~Toscanini The Da CINDY Code The Epic Poem Of The Balrog of Entmoot: Here ~NEW! ~ Thinking of summer vacation? AboutNewJersey.com - NJ Travel & Tourism Guide

05-30-2005, 08:57 PM	#80
Last Child of Ungoliant The Intermittent One Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: here and there Posts: 4,671	feelings brought to the surface shying scared of unknown taking time to sink back feelings now are passing

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