War For All Of Middle Earth™!

[Earniel]

OOC: Good thing that's not what you're really thinking. Oh wait, I don't want to know what you're thinking? That bad huh?

IC:
Eärniel: *paces the room* Fne! A liar! Not trustworthy! Not so bright! Hah!
Scaley: She never actually said the last part....
Eärniel: She implied it!
Scaley: You're just fed up bec...
Eärniel: Yes I'm fed up! It's no fair!
Entesse: It isn't?
Eärniel: I could have been chasing starfish of pestering gulls at the shoreside and what am I doing? Being ordered to go to Rivendell to save the world, being threatened with violence by a fearie...
Poiple: Faerie.
Eärniel: It's the same! Then they want an alliance with me and then they don't! And this is all getting political and I don't know anything about that.

*the dragons look worried at each other*

Entesse: *whispers* Uh-uh I think another depression is coming up. Quick get the chocolate!
Scaley: *quickly grabs plate of chocolate and offers it to Eärniel who immediately brightens up, stuffs her face and goes to sleep*
Poiple: Phiew.That was a close one....
Entesse: Yep, now what do you think about this Maggie?
Scaley: Mmmmm, she has a strong army of pink bunnies not to mention an impressive amount of alter-egos. She's smart, we'll have to play this cunningly too.
Poiple: Agreed but she must have a soft spot in her armour, the only aspect we dragons share with humans.
*they snigger and continue to plot with the soft snoring of Eärniel in the background*

[Willow Oran]

OOC: Beware the alter-egos, for there are many of them. And some are easily mistaken for eachother.
OOC2: Tika and Chicho are Pink Fluffy Bunnies. They are the main pink fluffy bunnies.

(While this is going on, Maggie is planning something.)

Maggie: Did she get the message Chicho?

Chicho: I believe so. Whether or not she will interpert it correctly I cannot say.

Maggie: What is Maggie doing?

Tika: She's stalling, the way she always does. She's got everyone confused with her riddles and promises.

Maggie: Do you think Human will follow her directions or mine?

Chicho: Hopefully yours. If Maggie gets her way she'll have middle earth at her command.

Maggie: Are Willow and Mahtaliel aware of the situation?

Tika: I don't think so, or if they are they're in the same situation as you are. With the evil side in total control of their bodies.

Chicho: It's likely. They tend to reflect you after all.

Tika: Do you want us to send any messages to the other girl? The one with the dragons?

Maggie: No. Let the third party form her own plans to deal with this situation. It may be that she'll end up as the only person with a clear enough mind to resolve it. She is the only player of this game not influenced by me or my other side. She must remain that way.

[Katt_knome_hobbit]

OOC: I feel like writing for you 'Liza. And I'm bringing in another character so thptpppppt!

*Human Pi, Glorfindel, and Elrond are all staring at the Mirror/Bunny gift in Lorien*

HumanPi: *Looks at mirror cross eyed and then throws it in the air* No way! No more riddles!

*Elrond and Glorfindel make desperate attempt to catch mirror and end up in a heap. A random squirrel left over from Dolenloteiel's squad caught the mirror and set it down neatly. It promptly vanished without thanks as all cute-furry-woodland-creatures-who-are-somewhat-helpful-at-times should do.*

Elrond: *Picking up Mirror* Are you crazy? You don't just throw an ally away like that.

Glorfindel: Yeah, especially if you ally is one of your enemies who wants to work for you instead.

*Just then the three were caught in a mist and felt themselves being transported somewhere. They were in a dark mist. A spotlight hit them and the mist rolled away. They couldn't see anything outside of the circle of light. They were really freaked out right about now.*

Elrond: *to Human Pi* Is this one of your doings?

HumanPi: No, and I'm as freaked as you are. *twitch*

*A figure stepped into the circle of light.*

Saurooookatt: Well, it seems that you have completed your mission to find the elves. What do you propose to do next?

Human Pi: I dunno. I guess find this good Maggie character in this evil mirror thing. And something else, the next time you want to talk to me could you call me on the phone or something?

Saurooookatt: *Completely ignoring Human* I see that you are still taking this plan lightly. I, however, have made a plan. It was all based on your completing your mission of course, which without me wouldn't have happened.

HumanPi: Yeahthankswhatever. Now can we get some more light in here? You’re acting like you are trying to scare us.

Glorfindel: Um, Human? She is looking pretty evil to me.

Elrond: Yes. Isn't that malicious glint in her eye supposed to be a warning that we shouldn't trust her.

HumanPi: Relax. She's a pothead. There isn't anything in her eyes except smoke.

Glorfindel: But, but--

HumanPi: I said relax. She is not dangerous. So she's a bit crazy, but aren’t we all? Hey, I know this girl; I'll tell you when to panic.

*All this time, Saurooookatt had been growing darker and her robe, which had been white, was now a dark purple.*

Saurooookatt: Many of us have doubted you for some time now. It is when you went away to Lorien that we realized that you could not lead us or defeat Maggie. You are no longer in control.

HumanPi: Start panicking.

Saurooookatt: We had one of your own army replace you. Penguin#492 now leads the penguin army. You have no one to command. Come my pet.

*HumanPi went to stand behind Saurooookatt in a trance and Elrond and Glorfindel were left alone*

Elrond: What do you want with us?

Saurooookatt: The only way to get Maggie is through her heart. *Glanced at Glorfindel* We will serve up her heart on a platter. I have an assistant for making such an arrangement. Skaiuk, come.

*From somewhere behind Saurooookatt something fell to the ground. Into the circle came a hideous Ork*

Skaiuk: *smiles* Let's make biscuits.

OOC: Whew! Sorry Eliza, I just got carried away. You can rise up and back stab me later if you like. 3366 letters in this post.

[Human#3.141592653]

OOC: Wah ha ha ha! Biscuits! Biscuits!
OOC: You know what, Maggie? Make a list of all the alter egos in play at this moment (including various versions of “Maggie” and please say if they are evil or no). Then, next to each name, say where they can be found. If it messes with your plan to say where they are, (ei. They are currently hidden,) then don’t. But I really need some help with this, I’m not as familiar with them as you are. Thank you kindly! Yeesh!

The elves Glorfindel and Elrond are sitting quietly, munching on some Lembas, recuperating after having to deal with human for almost half a day. The shadow of a near by tree covers their weary, stressed out bodies, as they sit gazing out on the Glory of Lorien, as is the popular pass time for elves. (It’s either that or gazing at the glory of them selves in a mirror.)
But…
Then, part of the shadow suddenly breaks away and begins to creep up on the elves…it takes a vaguely human shape, raising above it’s head A SHARP POINTY OBJECT.
The elves scream.

Awhile later….in (You fill in the blank) Maggie gets a package, heavily wrapped. After the first three layers is a note saying “Two can play at this game!” After the fourteenth layer is a note saying “A taste of your own medicine!” after the 26th layer is a note saying “Wa ha ha ha ha! SPOOOOON!” Two more layers of wrappings and she comes to a small box. She opens the box, and inside are some biscuits…
Long strands of blonde hair stick out of the biscuits….
“Oh gods no…” moans Maggie. “She made them into biscuits….”
Maggie stands agast, thinking that Human had sunk to a new low, when she spied the note inside the box. It read as follows.

“Confusticate and bombother you! Your confounded riddles are making me mad! Let me how to use the mirror to defeat Maggie, Maggie…um, yeah. Tell me how to use the mirror, or I shall make biscuits out of Elrond! And if you still won’t tell me, then I shall make biscuits out of your beloved Glorfindel! Wa ha ha ha ha! So evil!

Faithfully yours,

Human# 3.141592653589793238462643383279502884197169399375 1058209749445923078164062862 0899862803482534211707….”

Back in Lorien, Glorfindel wails and cries out in pain.
“MY HAIR! Oh my beautiful hair!”
Elrond tries to console him, “Oh Glofie, it’ll grow back…”
Human stand dressed in a Rocky Horror Picture show Frankenfurter costume, with a feathered head dress holding a penguin drinking proper English style tea, while passing said penguin over the mirror which lies on the ground.
Human: Boom-shwati-OOSH!
Human observes the mirror. Mirror remines inert.
Human passes penguin over the mirror again.
Human: Boom-shwati-OOSH!
Human observes the mirror. Mirror remines inert.
Human: *to penguin* Third times a charm, I swear!

[Katt_knome_hobbit]

OOC: Um, We have a conflict in posts Eliza. What to do?

[Human#3.141592653]

Apperently, Katt posted while I was posting. Oops.
Just think of them in the dark spooky cave where Katt took Human and Elrond and Glorfindel.
Hee hee...

Shadow: But what no body knew was that while all of this had been going on, I, the shadow, have gathered to me all Mini-balrogs and have, successfully, conquored the lands in the South and West, inlcuding Gondor, Rohan, Rivendale, and most of the lands surounding the East of the shire, (but not the shire itself.)
Who I am and what I want wil be revealed in good time. All in good time...

[Katt_knome_hobbit]

OOC: THis is the refrence post. This is where everybody is as far as I know.

OOC2: Eliza, Human Pi is powerless, but your Shadow is working in alliance with Skaiuk behind Saurooookatt's back! Ha ha!!! So Glorfindel and Elrond are being held in a dungon in Isanguard.

Location- People there

The Shire- Tano (possibly) Penguin#492 and penguin army
Lorien- No one anymore, right?
Imladris- Earniell, Evil Maggie, Dragons? I dunno. The guys we are fighting
Misty Mountains- Glorfindul's_Balrog and balrog army waiting to attack Imladris
Mordor- Sauronkatt and Ork army
Another plane of extance- good maggie (hint)
Isanguard- Saurooookatt, HumanPi, Elrond and Glorfindel locked in a dungon, Shadow in a lower dungon with Skaiuk
Other lands (Gondor, Rohan, Rivendale, and most of the lands surounding the East of the shire)- mini balrog army


I hope this clarifies it

[Earniel]

OOC: Phieuw, this is getting complicated... Rivendale, Rivendale... where does that lie again?

*Meanwhile Eärniel wakes up from her chocolate induced sleep to find only Poiple and Entesse talking in hushed tones.*

Eärniel: Where's Scaley?

Poiple: Recon mission.

Eärniel: What?

Poiple: She has left to see just what Maggie has been doing to Rivendell and she's also trying to locate any real Rivendell-elves, possibly even Elrond's sons.

Eärniel: Why?

Entesse: We want to know who's still on our side. Also we've been trying to psycho-analyse this Maggie.

Eärniel: Oh and did it work?

Entesse: Only to a certain extent. She's a very complicated person. Certain alter-egos of her seem to have the power to manifest themselves physically but possibly more remain within Maggie's body herself.

Eärniel: I thought you guys didn't even know what an alter-ego was.

Poiple: *smugly* We're not so stupid as you look.

Eärniel: *tries to figure it out and fails* Oh, I see.

Entesse: We're waiting until Scaley returns with more data.

[Willow Oran]

OOC: Oh dear. I should probably explain the alter egos a bit now...

(Just then scaley returned to the room, dragging a nervous looking faerie behind him.)

Willow: I didn't do it! Really I didn't!

Earniel: Didn't do what? We aren't accusing you of anything yet, we just want some explanations.

Willow: Of what?

Earniel: Of all these alter egos running around! How many are there, are there more than we see? And-

Willow: Alright I see your point. First of all there are only three alter egos. Good Maggie and Evil Maggie and the master ego who you need not know about yet. Then there are the characters there are 86 of us in use but only Mahtaliel and me are currently manifested. That's all!

Earniel: Oh... So, which maggie is this one?

Willow: She's the evil Maggie. I don't know what happened to Good Maggie or why I didn't dissapear along with her. The master ego is up to something. She has a plan for all of this but it's going wrong somehow. She meant to have the Good Maggie in control and everyone safe here while Huan and Katt fought over the rest of middle earth. But then Evil Maggie took over and started all these riddles and stuff and now it's all falling apart...

Earniel: Wait... So what happened to the Normal residents of middle earth? Did she do something to them?

Willow: I think so... Katt has Elrond and Glorfindel captive and she's holding them hostage.

Earniel: So what did she do with Galadriel and Celeborn? I know she did something to them so... What?

Willow: Err... They got sent back.

Earniel: Back to where?

Willow: Back to... well, just generally back, in time.

Earniel: Oh dear.

[Human#3.141592653]

OOC: Maggie, you are a very complicated person with ...with....with...STOP CHECKING MY SPELLING!
And far too many persons living in your brain.....

Isengard:

Glorfindel is still weeping over the loss of his hair...
"My hair! My precious precious hair!!!"
But even Elrond had grown tired of the dramatics. But still the fear of being made into elf biscuits was enough to subdue the both of them for the time being....WHA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!!
Elrond: "where are we?"
GF: "I don't know."
E: think that we're lost."
GF: "Shhh!"
E: "Glorfindel? I'm hungry..."
GL *thinks about making Elrond into Elf Biscuit*
E: "Wait a minute...why are you smiling dementedly?"
GL: "No reason."
E: *Thinks about making Glorfindel Into an Elf Biscuit.*
GL: Hey...stop drooling at me!"
E: Stop being so damn pretty!
GL: *Whining* stop pushing me around!
*They fight. Elrond starting chewing on Glorfindel's leg, when suddenly Human pops up from a small sewer drain.*
Human: Hey! Stop that! Both of you, stop it right now!
The elves look a little shame face, but then Glorfindel kicks Elrond in the shins.
Human: What are you two doing...no. I don't want to know. I'm here because we're busting out of this joint!
Elves: YEAH!
Human: But there's one catch. This drain is a rather tight squeeze. I'm afraid that Glorfindel is going to have to strip naked and grease up.
E: And what about me? *Suggestively*
Human: No. You're skinny enough to fit. Now hurry up, Glorfie and strip!

At the top of of Isengard:
Sauroookatt: *Sings* Tra la la la lally, down here in the valley, ha ha ha ha!
*looks out window and sees Elrond and and Human running arcoss the fjiods with a very naked...*
Sauroookatt: Is that Glorfindel?! I can see why Maggie likes him...
Guards! Catch those elves and that Human!
But the gaurds are little afraid of tackling a naked running elf who has defeated a balrog.
And thus do they escape...

Off in the woods...
Human: *whipping out mirror* Now I can use it! *Chanting generic Mirror spell*
The mirror begins to glow....

[Willow Oran]

(As the mirror's glow increased it enveloped the three escapees and dissapeared taking the three with it.)

Human: It seems I used it correctly this time.

Maggie: Indeed you did. (Hands Glorfindel a robe.) Go clean yourself off and put sme clothes on. As much as I enjoy your nakedness there isn't time to enjoy it properly right now.

(Glorfindel looks immensly relieved at this pronouncement.)

Elrond: (sighs resignedly) And what would you do to us M'lady? So far we've been imprisoned in the most cruel of circumstances and our dignity stripped from us, along with our clothing. Been threatened, starved and many other things that I will not list. Are you going to continue the trend?

Maggie: No, I'm the nice one. (Hands Elrond a second robe.) Go join your friend, get clean. Reclaim your dignity, please. Then come back when you are ready and we will deal with my evil counterpart. And beware, the hot water is on the right, NOT the left.

(This is puntuated by a yelp of shock coming from the next room, indicating that Glorfindel had just found this out the hard way. When Elrond has gone she turns to Human.)

Maggie: Now, you have a lot to answer for... But before I do anything we have to deal with my evil side. And Katt. The master ego has something planned but I not entirely sure what it is yet. We will find out when we find our allies.

Human: You realize that made no sense whatsoerver don't you?

Maggie: Of course I realize that. Now come on, let's watch the elfies get cleaned off while we still can. And don't even think about elf biscuits!

[Earniel]

OOC: God, Willow YOU'RE CONFUSING! Willow? or was it Maggie? I lost count! :completely confused but oddly enjoying it smiley:

OOC2: BTW Scaley is a she and so is Entesse. Poiple is a he.

Eärniel: Counting on her fingers. So three alter-ego's, 86 characters, only 2 in use.... that leaves...... Yeah, I think I got it.
Scaly: About time.
Eärniel: So you don't know what happened to Good Maggie?
Willow:No.
Eärniel: So I guess it'll be pretty pointless asking you then where to find her.
Willow: Yep.
Eärniel: Bugger.

*all think about this for a while*

Eärniel: Would Good Maggie return if we defeat Evil Maggie?
Entesse: I think it's more a question of how do we defeat Evil Maggie.
Poiple: Not to mention, would Good Maggie also actually be good?

all:*turn to Willow in unison* Well? Speak up!

[Katt_knome_hobbit]

OOC: So apperantly, Good Maggie, Human, Elrond, and Glorfindel are all in some alternate plane of existance and are trapped there.

OOC2: Damnit! I can't do unspeakable evil now. But, I can still reveal my secret... Lets disect my whole existance.

*Just then, Katt was beamed into the room with Good Maggie, Human, Elrond, and Glorfindel. She was in a running position and immidiatly fell over. Good Maggie, Human, Elrond, and Glorfindel jumped up and got ready to run at her.*

Good Maggie (GM): What are you doing here?

Human(H): You trator Mutant!!!

Elrond(E): You are an enimy of all elves!

Glorfindel(G): Wait, which one are you?

Katt(K): I'm not one of them.

GM: What?

K: I am not one of the alter egos of myself. I am Katharine Anne Carlson.

E: Your "alter egos" are under your control then!!!

K: Perhaps I should answer Maggie's question. I was imprisoned by Saurooookatt, and I escaped by following you out.

GM: But why would she imprision you?

K: She is a part of my imagionation. I used to be able to control her. But she became too strong. She took my imagination and left me forever. My imagination is with her and from that she made many others including Skaiuk. But she couldn't kill me. She would have if she could. But we are linked. Killing me would be destroying all my alter egoes.

H: So, she sent you here? Why?

K: When I escaped, she realized that she couldn't keep me with her. She sent me to an alternet plane of existance instead. But I still had some power, and I willed myself here. I had to follow you. *Looks at Glorfindel* We have a problem.

G: *Sheepish Grin*

GM: What are you talking about?

K: I'm pregnant.

*Good Maggie Faints, Elrond stumbles backward, Glorfindel gets a look of I-have-no-idea-how-to-react-or-what-to-do-right-now on his face, and Human just stands there looking puzzled*

H: But, when? I mean...

G: Well, uh... *Shuffles Feet*

K: We, um, were in the same cell for awhile. I was hidden in the shadows. Then Elrond got taken away and um...

G: Uh, um, yeah.

K: Is there a place where I can hide from Maggie for a while? I don't want to be here when she wakes up.

OOC3: Yes!!! I did it anyway!!!

Edit: I finished the post cuz I didn't have time in the class I was writing this in.

[goldiegollum]

just then, something fell down from a tree (in the same plane of existance as good maggie and co) and fell on top of Elrond

Elrond*throws thing off and tries to regain dignity by brushing the moss from his robes*

Thing*grabs a fringe on Elronds robe, exclaiming, it's so happy!, happy happy!"

the thing might have been an elf if it wasn't so short, might have been a hobbit if it was shorter, might have been gollum if it was meaner, and didn't have so much dirty golden curls coming out of it's head. It also might have been a human (actually it was a human, but not really, so don't tell anyone

Thing: *notices others* Oh, hi, i'm goldiegollum, but call me goldie because it's happier, YAAAy!!!

[Willow Oran]

(Sadly for Katt G. Maggie had woken up and heard the entire thing.)

Maggie: Katt, we've gone over this, the person you were in a cell with was Glorfindel's evil twin Glordifle who was created earlier by Human.

Katt: Then how come he knew what I was talking about?

Maggie: It's very simple. I stole Glordifle and passed him off as Glorfindel in my riddles. The real Glorfindel is still hidden.

Human: Oh no... not again. Where is he?

Maggie: Only er... well only she knows but... I'm not entirely sure who she is.

Goldie: Huh? What happened to Glorfindel? Does this have anything to do with the pictures Human was drawing for you yesterday?

Katt: Pictures?

Human: My ID was drawing a picture of Glorfi and Maggie together yesterday morning, it's not finished yet.

Earniel: I think we should combine all these alter egos and get the real versions before figuring these things out. Who is not and does not have an alter ego running around?

(Earniel, the 3 dragons, and the 2 elves, and Goldiegollum raise their hands.)

Katt: Oh dear.

[Earniel]

OOC: I'm getting confuseder by the minute. How did I suddenly end up in another plane of existence?

[Katt_knome_hobbit]

OOC: I dunno Eärniel, I thought you were in Imladris. Maggie should explain now.

OOC2: Isn't that just like me? Always going after the evil twin.

[goldiegollum]

Earniel: *consults with dragons for a minute, then turns to good Maggie* You see, the problem is i don't know exactly how i got here-

Goldie: Me neither, i was climbing a tree, then the next thing i knew i fell out, into this demention

Elrond: and onto me!

Goldie: sorry about that

Elrond: If i had any dignity left i would not allow for such carelessness, but things being as they are, i think we should focus on how to get out.

All others look at maggie, Kat and Human

Earniel: Well, it was you who got us into this mess in the first place, (or in some cases your alter egos, if i ever git that figured out) so i think it would be fair to say it's your resposibility to git us out again. I can't do anything about it at all, seeing as how i don't even no how i suddenly got into this demension

[Katt_knome_hobbit]

Good Maggie: We aren't even in another dimention. *smiles Evily*

*The sceen fades and everyone is in Imladres (OOC: crap I can't spell) again.*

Good Maggie: I am not really good Maggie. I am the Evil one. Not everyone here is real. *Snaps fingers and Elrond dissapears* He was fake. I created an alternet universe inside Imladris for the sole purpouse of bringing you here Katt. Human was in alliance with me since before your alter egoes took over. *Points to Glordifle* What is all this about you and Katt?

Glordifle: Hey, I brought her here like you asked. I just... and then this was a total accident.

Evil Maggie: *To Katt* You were supposed to think that it was Glorfindel and help them escape. Human here messed it up, but we have made an aggrement.

Human: Yeah whatever. spoon

Evil Maggie: And you *points at Goldiegollum* I don't know what we are going to do with you.

Katt: So...

Evil Maggie: YOu are a prisioner here.


OOC: Hey Maggie, is this all right? Tell me and I'll delete my post or something.

[Willow Oran]

OOC: That was perfect Katt. Thank you. Mwahahahaa!!!!!!!

E. Maggie: You, are a prisenor here Katt.

Katt: Uh oh... Um, Human, help... please.

E. Maggie: She isn't the real human either. Sadly my goodie twoshoes alter ego has managed to escape the prison I placed her in and she has the real Human, Elrond, and Glorfindel with her. Along with those stupid bunnies. I'll deal with her later. You Katt are to come with me. We're going to have a little talk with some of your alter egos.

Earniel: You are insane lady... insane, sick and twisted.

E. Maggie: You bet I am. Willow, Mahtaliel, guard this elf and her companions. Don't let them escape.

(She leaves, dragging Katt with her. Mahtaliel slips into the room and closes the door. She and Willow take up guard positions beside it.)

Earniel(after waiting a moment): Alright you two, that's enough you can let us go now while she's busy.

There is no answer.

Earniel: Guys, this isn't funny, let us out of here, please!

Willow: I'm afraid we can't miss, see, we're under her control right now, if she wants to she can erase us. She has total control.

Earniel: What? But she's just an alter ego! What about her other aspects?

Mahtaliel: (sighs) The only way she could be over thrown is if we found Good maggie and tricked them into combining so that they occupy the same body again. If that happened it would draw the real one into this and she's the only one who can untangle this mess. But in the meantime we have oders we can't let you or the dragons leave.

GG: What about me?

E, M, & W: What?

GG: Me, She didn't say anything about keeping me here. You can send me to find the good maggie and her friends and bring them back here to combine the two.

Mahtaliel: (smiles) That may work. (she opens the door) Here, go and find them. Be careful.