|
04-20-2005, 07:17 PM
|
#741 | |
|
Elf Lord
Join Date: Dec 2000
Location: Fountain Valley, CA
Posts: 6,343
|
Quote:
__________________
If the world has indeed, as I have said, been built of sorrow, it has been built by the hands of love, because in no other way could the soul of man, for whom the world was made, reach the full stature of its perfection. ~Oscar Wilde, written from prison Oscar Wilde's last words: "Either the wallpaper goes, or I do." |
|
|
|
|
04-21-2005, 11:04 PM
|
#742 |
|
Canadian Guy.
Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: The true North Strong and Free
Posts: 1,513
|
What's the difference between a Ford and a golf ball?
You can drive a golf ball 200 yards.
__________________
"Canadians are so apathetic, but, what are you gonna do about it" -Glen Foster Wierd Harry Potter quotes  the old nintendo duck hunt game Lemmings Swron Random Homer Simpson Quotes |
|
|
|
|
04-22-2005, 11:30 AM
|
#743 | |
|
Elentári
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: South Africa
Posts: 727
|
Quote:
 I had to do it. |
|
|
|
|
|
06-13-2005, 11:28 AM
|
#745 |
|
Elentári
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: South Africa
Posts: 727
|
That's just wierd...
|
|
|
|
|
06-13-2005, 01:44 PM
|
#746 | |
|
Lady Tipple & Queen of Blessed Thistle
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: I've been told it's all in my head
Posts: 916
|
Quote:
That worked WAY TOO WELL! LOL Thanks for sharring that!
__________________
Beer + Pizza = N'uff said  Happy to be here The HACBR has been alerted to my postings…..Hobbits Against Constant Beer References Beer is living proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy. --Ben Franklin I want my Mooter T-Shirt!
|
|
|
|
|
|
07-23-2005, 04:07 AM
|
#747 |
|
Elf Lord
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: Mirkwood, well actually I live in North-west Scania, Sweden
Posts: 9,481
|
The Jokes Thread
Facts from the Bible...
1. Noah's wife was Joan of Arc. 2. Lot's wife was a pillar of salt by day and ball of fire by night. 3. Moses went to the top of mount Cyanide to get the Ten Commandments. 4. The seventh commandment is "Thou shall not admit adultery". 5. Joshua led the Hebrews in the battle of Geritol. 6. Jesus was born because Mary had an immaculate contraption. 7. The people who followed Jesus were called the 12 Decibles. 8. The epistles were the wives of the apostles. 9. One of the opossums was St Matthew. 10. Salome danced in seven veils in front of King Harrods. 11. Paul preached acrimony, which is another name for marriage. 12. David fought the Finkelsteins, a race of people who lived in biblical times. 13. The Jews had trouble throughout history with unsympathetic Genitals. 14. A Christian should have only one wife. This is called monotony. ...and there you have it. Last edited by Tessar : 07-23-2005 at 04:30 PM. Reason: Trying to fix the title of the main thread. |
|
|
|
|
07-23-2005, 10:03 AM
|
#748 |
|
Elven Maiden
Join Date: Aug 2002
Posts: 3,309
|
Very silly but very funny! I say "lol" sometimes even when I don't literally laugh out loud, but this time I really did, so thanks.
 |
|
|
|
|
07-23-2005, 12:13 PM
|
#749 |
|
Elf Lord
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: sikeston, MO, usa, earth, sol
Posts: 3,114
|
#15 It is only a sin if you do something wrong...and get caught.
__________________
Inked "Aslan is not a tame lion." CSL/LWW "The new school [acts] as if it required...courage to say a blasphemy. There is only one thing that requires real courage to say, and that is a truism." GK Chesterton "And there is always the danger of allowing people to suppose that our modern times are so wholly unlike any other times that the fundamental facts about man's nature have wholly changed with changing circumstances." Dorothy L. Sayers, 1 Sept. 1941 |
|
|
|
|
07-23-2005, 04:31 PM
|
#750 |
|
Cardboard Harp of Gondor 
Join Date: Sep 2001
Location: IM IN UR POSTZ, EDITIN' UR WURDZ
Posts: 6,433
|
The Jokes Thread
Trying to fix a mistake *cough*
WHOOT! Fixed it. I am teh 1337z0r!!! |
|
|
|
|
09-09-2005, 06:11 PM
|
#751 | ||
|
Friendly Neigborhood Sith Lord
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: USA
Posts: 2,080
|
Jokes: funny ones preferably, funny stories and whatever.
I got a great joke post deleted out of another thread
 , so why don't we have a thread of jokes and funny stories (funny trues stories are great ) and if we feel philosophical we can talk about the origin of humor, my late post read like this why is what doctors do called practice? why are the people who invest your money called brokers? what have the rest of you got? lets hear it (or read it as the case may be)
__________________
I was Press Secretary for the Berlioz administration and also, but not limited to, owner and co operator of fully armed and operational battle station EDDIE Quote:
Quote:
|
||
|
|
|
|
09-09-2005, 06:13 PM
|
#752 |
|
Entmoot Attorney-General,
Equilibrating the Scales of Justice, Administrator ♎ 
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Stockholm, Sweden
Posts: 3,891
|
edity edit
__________________
An unwritten post is a delightful universe of infinite possibilities. Set down one word, however, and it immediately becomes earthbound. Set down one sentence and it’s halfway to being just like every other bloody entry that’s ever been written. ☻ |
|
|
|
|
09-09-2005, 06:15 PM
|
#753 |
|
Cardboard Harp of Gondor
Join Date: Sep 2001
Location: IM IN UR POSTZ, EDITIN' UR WURDZ
Posts: 6,433
|
*snap* Jonathan was a split second faster in posting than I was in merging. *sob*
|
|
|
|
|
09-09-2005, 06:20 PM
|
#754 | ||
|
Friendly Neigborhood Sith Lord
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: USA
Posts: 2,080
|
sorry
 i had never seen that before but i'll take true stories too.or Tessar can delete it i don't care
__________________
I was Press Secretary for the Berlioz administration and also, but not limited to, owner and co operator of fully armed and operational battle station EDDIE Quote:
Quote:
|
||
|
|
|
|
09-09-2005, 06:26 PM
|
#755 |
|
Cardboard Harp of Gondor
Join Date: Sep 2001
Location: IM IN UR POSTZ, EDITIN' UR WURDZ
Posts: 6,433
|
Why would I delete it? It's in the right thread now
. |
|
|
|
|
09-09-2005, 06:29 PM
|
#756 | |
Join Date: Nov 2003
Location: Narnia
Posts: 1,656
|
Why couldn't the young pirate go to see a movie?
__________________
Mike nodded. A sombre nod. The nod Napoleon might have given if somebody had met him in 1812 and said, "So, you're back from Moscow, eh?". Interested in C.S. Lewis? Visit the forum dedicated to one of Tolkien's greatest contemporaries. |
|
|
|
|
|
09-09-2005, 08:36 PM
|
#757 |
|
"The Bomb"
Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: all over the place
Posts: 1,601
|
At work today we got some news that Lance Armstrong was indeed in possession of three banned substances during his last Tour de France.
 Luckily those in charge of the race are allowing him to keep his record without any asterisk next to his name or any indication of shame, since he's such an inspiration, and since the substances are banned only in France and no where else. Besides, it was just soap, shampoo, and deoderant.
__________________
Could it be that one path to enlightenment leads through insanity? |
|
|
|
|
09-13-2005, 11:26 AM
|
#758 |
|
Dúnedain Ranger of the North
Join Date: Aug 2000
Location: The Ruins of Arnor
Posts: 892
|
Jokes....
Heres another religious one...
A Jew, a Catholic and a Mormon were having drinks at the bar following an interfaith meeting. The Jew, bragging on his virility, said, "I have four sons. One more and I'll have a basketball team." The Catholic, waived off this accomplishment, stating, "That's nothing, boy. I have 10 sons, one more and I'll have a football team." To which the Mormon replied, "You guys ain't got a clue. I have 17 wives. One more and I'll have a golf course."
__________________
"I am an outlaw, I was born an outlaw's son. The highway is my legacy, on the highway I will run." |
|
|
|
|
09-23-2005, 06:07 PM
|
#759 |
|
of the House of Fëanor
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Los Angeles
Posts: 6,150
|
Bart Simpson
**********************************************
BART SIMPSON'S PUNISHMENT... *********************************************** The opening credits of "The Simpsons" shows Bart Simpson writing the same sentence over and over again on a chalkboard; the old "write it 100 times" punishment, which establishes him as a troublemaker. Each episode is different. Someone apparently went to the trouble of taping all the Simpsons, watching them all and writing down what Bart is writing on the board. These are the collected writings of Bart Simpson from the opening credits. Even if you're not a fan, you'll like these: I will not carve gods. I will not spank others. I will not aim for the head. I will not barf unless I'm sick. I will not expose the ignorance of the faculty. I saw nothing unusual in the teacher's lounge. I will not conduct my own fire drills. Funny noises are not funny. I will not snap bras. I will not fake seizures. This punishment is not boring and pointless. My name is not Dr. Death. I will not prescribe medication. I will not bury the new kid. I will not teach others to fly. I will not bring sheep to class. A burp is not an answer. Teacher is not a leper. Coffee is not for kids. I will not eat things for money. I will not yell "She's Dead" at roll call. The principal's toupee is not a Frisbee. I will not call the principal "spud head". Goldfish don't bounce. Mud is not one of the 4 food groups. No one is interested in my underpants. I will not sell miracle cures. I will return the seeing-eye dog. I do not have diplomatic immunity. I will not charge admission to the bathroom. The cafeteria deep fryer is not a toy. All work and no play makes Bart a dull boy. I will not say "Springfield" just to get applause. I am not authorized to fire substitute teachers. My homework was not stolen by a one-armed man. I will not go near the kindergarten turtle. I am not deliciously saucy. Organ transplants are best left to professionals. The Pledge of Allegiance does not end with "Hail Satan". I will not celebrate meaningless milestones. There are plenty of businesses like show business. Five days is not too long to wait for a gun. I will not waste chalk. I will not skateboard in the halls. Underwear should be worn on the inside. I will never win an Emmy. I will not torment the emotionally frail.
__________________
Few people have the imagination for reality.
~Johann Wolfgang von Goethe Last edited by Lotesse : 09-23-2005 at 06:09 PM. |
|
|
|
|
09-23-2005, 10:55 PM
|
#760 | ||
|
Friendly Neigborhood Sith Lord
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: USA
Posts: 2,080
|
LOL
__________________
I was Press Secretary for the Berlioz administration and also, but not limited to, owner and co operator of fully armed and operational battle station EDDIE Quote:
Quote:
|
||
|
|
|
 |
|
|
Similar Threads
|
||||
| Thread | Thread Starter | Forum | Replies | Last Post |
| Discussion Thread: Nomads from the East | Nurvingiel | RPG Forum | 83 | 02-21-2005 07:23 PM |
Linear Mode
