20 Ways to Maintain a Healthy Level of Insanity

jellyfishannah · 03-31-2004, 03:15 PM

Someone sent this to me through email. Has anyone ever seen it before? :

20 Ways To Maintain A Healthy Level of Insanity

1. At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and Point A Hair
Dryer At Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down.

2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice.

3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, Ask If They Want Fries with that.

4. Put Your Garbage Can On Your Desk And Label It "In."

5. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks. Once Everyone Has Gotten Over
Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch To Espresso.

6. In The Memo Field Of All Your Checks, Write "For Sexual Favors"

7. Finish All Your Sentences With "In Accordance With The Prophecy."

8. Don't Use Any Punctuation

9. As Often As Possible, Skip Rather Than Walk.

10... Ask People What Sex They Are. Laugh Hysterically After They Answer.

11. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is "To Go."

12. Sing Along At The Opera.

13. Go To A Poetry Recital And Ask Why The Poems Don't Rhyme

14. Put Mosquito Netting Around Your Work Area And Play Tropical Sounds All
Day.

15. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend Their Party
Because You're Not In The Mood.

16. Have Your Co-workers Address You By Your Wrestling Name, Rock Hard.

17. When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream "I Won!, I Won!"

18. When Leaving The Zoo, Start Running Towards The Parking Lot, Yelling
"Run For Your Lives, They're Loose!!"

19. Tell Your Children Over Dinner. "Due To The Economy, We Are Going To
Have To Let One Of You Go."

And The Final Way To Keep A Healthy Level Of Insanity.......

20. Send This E-mail To Someone To Make Them Smile..Its Called Therapy...

mithrand1r · 03-31-2004, 07:39 PM

I have not seen this, but most of them are funny.

I like #4

Quote:

4. Put Your Garbage Can On Your Desk And Label It "In."

#1 would probably work better if you have a car model that matched what the police use.

Quote:

1. At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and Point A Hair Dryer At Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down.

Last Child of Ungoliant · 03-31-2004, 07:41 PM

thank you, jellyfishannah,
you have made me laugh,
the world needs to laugh more often

Lizra · 03-31-2004, 07:58 PM

I really like #2 (I would do that, in a second!

) and #11. Some of these would earn you an annoying twit award though!

gollum9630 · 03-31-2004, 08:01 PM

#18's the best. I wonder what people's reactions would be though, although afterwords you might get in major trouble

Millane · 04-01-2004, 08:48 AM

number 7 is hilarious

number 16 hhahahahahaha rock hard

number 5's just downright mean

Beruthiel's cat · 04-01-2004, 02:03 PM

I've actually done #2. (My co-workers know I'm out there...they thought it was pretty funny...)

Hector probably does #12

I used to work at a bank, so I like #17.

#19 sounds like something my dad would have done when we were kids, if he'd thought of it....

No one would be able to tell if I did #4!!!

Nerdanel · 04-01-2004, 05:09 PM

I love them!

I haven't seen them before.

I like 1, 10 and 12 the best.

I agree with Chrys.

Sminty_Smeagol · 04-01-2004, 06:53 PM

more like '20 ways to maintain a healthy level of obnoxity' ...if thats a word... haha jp ive heard some of those before

03-31-2004, 08:01 PM	#5
gollum9630 Canadian Guy. Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: The true North Strong and Free Posts: 1,513	#18's the best. I wonder what people's reactions would be though, although afterwords you might get in major trouble __________________ "Canadians are so apathetic, but, what are you gonna do about it" -Glen Foster Wierd Harry Potter quotes the old nintendo duck hunt game Lemmings Swron Random Homer Simpson Quotes

04-01-2004, 08:48 AM	#6
Millane The Dude Join Date: Sep 2002 Location: at the altar of my ego Posts: 1,685	number 7 is hilarious number 16 hhahahahahaha rock hard number 5's just downright mean __________________ Ill heal your wounds, ill set you free,

04-01-2004, 02:03 PM	#7
Beruthiel's cat mystical divinity of Unashamed Felinity Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: New York's beautiful North Coast -- we're all mad here!!! Posts: 635	I've actually done #2. (My co-workers know I'm out there...they thought it was pretty funny...) Hector probably does #12 I used to work at a bank, so I like #17. #19 sounds like something my dad would have done when we were kids, if he'd thought of it.... No one would be able to tell if I did #4!!! __________________ "Never try to out-stubborn a cat!" -- R. Heinlein ~~~~~~~~~ "But I don't want to be among mad people, " Alice remarked. "Oh, but you can't help that," said the Cat; "We're all mad here. I'm mad. You're mad." "How do you know I'm mad?" said Alice. "You must be," said the Cat, "or you wouldn't have come here." ~~ Lewis Carroll ~~~~~~~~~~~ Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana...

04-01-2004, 05:09 PM	#8
Nerdanel Spammer of the Happy Thread Join Date: Dec 2003 Location: Helsinki, Finland Posts: 3,512	I love them! I haven't seen them before. I like 1, 10 and 12 the best. I agree with Chrys. __________________ "Somewhere, something incredible is waiting to be known. " - C. Sagan My (photography) website My Flickr page

04-01-2004, 06:53 PM	#9
Sminty_Smeagol Manic Cardboard-Box Dweller Join Date: Aug 2002 Location: In a house Posts: 1,071	more like '20 ways to maintain a healthy level of obnoxity' ...if thats a word... haha jp ive heard some of those before __________________ I love the fishes.

03-31-2004, 03:15 PM	#1
jellyfishannah Elven Warrior Join Date: Sep 2003 Location: The Library, may it live forever!!! Posts: 269	20 Ways to Maintain a Healthy Level of Insanity Someone sent this to me through email. Has anyone ever seen it before? : 20 Ways To Maintain A Healthy Level of Insanity 1. At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and Point A Hair Dryer At Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down. 2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice. 3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, Ask If They Want Fries with that. 4. Put Your Garbage Can On Your Desk And Label It "In." 5. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks. Once Everyone Has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch To Espresso. 6. In The Memo Field Of All Your Checks, Write "For Sexual Favors" 7. Finish All Your Sentences With "In Accordance With The Prophecy." 8. Don't Use Any Punctuation 9. As Often As Possible, Skip Rather Than Walk. 10... Ask People What Sex They Are. Laugh Hysterically After They Answer. 11. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is "To Go." 12. Sing Along At The Opera. 13. Go To A Poetry Recital And Ask Why The Poems Don't Rhyme 14. Put Mosquito Netting Around Your Work Area And Play Tropical Sounds All Day. 15. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend Their Party Because You're Not In The Mood. 16. Have Your Co-workers Address You By Your Wrestling Name, Rock Hard. 17. When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream "I Won!, I Won!" 18. When Leaving The Zoo, Start Running Towards The Parking Lot, Yelling "Run For Your Lives, They're Loose!!" 19. Tell Your Children Over Dinner. "Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go." And The Final Way To Keep A Healthy Level Of Insanity....... 20. Send This E-mail To Someone To Make Them Smile..Its Called Therapy... __________________ "Always forgive your enemies - nothing annoys them so much." ~Oscar Wilde "Don't tell lies you can't keep." ~My little sister...

03-31-2004, 07:41 PM	#3
Last Child of Ungoliant The Intermittent One Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: here and there Posts: 4,671	thank you, jellyfishannah, you have made me laugh, the world needs to laugh more often

03-31-2004, 07:58 PM	#4
Lizra Domesticated Swing Babe Join Date: May 2002 Location: Reality Posts: 5,340	I really like #2 (I would do that, in a second! ) and #11. Some of these would earn you an annoying twit award though! __________________ Happy Atheist Go Democrats!