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Old 12-16-2008, 03:19 PM   #1
Grey_Wolf
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The Guardians of Balance - Discussion Thread

For thousands of years prosperity and peacy had reigned in the Kingdom. The magical armour and weapons of the King had been made by especially gifted smiths and magicians, and its properties kept the land harmonious and the people content. But the Guardians, appointed to serve the King, soon marked a weakening in the magic and was deeply disturbed.

And suddenly, war come upon the Island, from the hosts of the Overlord across the sea, and the King and his knights rode out to defeat the Enemy.

But, alas, he was slain as was most of his men. But all hope was not dashed.

In order for the Suit and the Weapons not to fall into the hands of the Enemy, each one of the Guardians took a piece of it and travelled to the corners of the Land in order to keep them safe from harm and ill-use.

Centuries passed and the people suffered under the ironheel of the Overlord and the hords of the Enemy roamed the Land, torturing or slaying anyone coming in their way or having the courage, briefly, to stand up against them. But hope still lingered. That one day a Champion would appear to reclaim the Throne and free the people.

(What do you think, does it have promise?)
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Old 12-16-2008, 04:00 PM   #2
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If it's well written, it has promise so long as the characters are interesting. The plot follows a very common fantasy idea of a chosen one questing for magical items that will allow him/her to defeat a powerful evil... but what makes a story good is how you choose to play that storyline out .
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Old 12-17-2008, 01:07 AM   #3
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Thanks, Tessar, we'll see how many see it as interesting concept. Perhaps could help in the shaping of the characters, since Im not very good at that sort of thing.
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Old 12-22-2008, 12:36 PM   #4
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Do you intend to write a story, or make it into another RPG?
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Old 12-23-2008, 01:09 AM   #5
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Well no - I think this another dead or dying story attempt of mine. Ill just leave it be.
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Old 12-23-2008, 02:05 AM   #6
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I wouldn't say give it up. At this point it sounds under-developed. All you've said so far is a very, very basic outline that doesn't mention any characters, any of the trials they have to face, or anything about the world that might be of interest to the story... like politics, or maybe geography.

If you flesh it out more, it might blossom into a great story idea .
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Old 12-23-2008, 02:14 AM   #7
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GW,

When approaching a story of this kind, the first thing you should do is draw/write up portraits of your main protagonists. Then you need to write---in a way that is addressed to yourself---what your story is about.

But whatever you do, make sure you have at least ONE final resolution planned. Endings are the hardest, so I'm not saying you should or could tackle that right away.
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Old 12-23-2008, 08:25 AM   #8
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What they said GW. At this point it is not very clear what you want to do with the story, what you want it to be.
We've already established you have a lot of imagination, now you just got to plan it out a bit more
Good luck and DON'T GIVE UP! >_<
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Old 12-23-2008, 10:09 AM   #9
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P.S. In Soviet Russia, you do not give up on story idea. Story idea gives up on YOU.


So till the time you move to Soviet Russia, don't give up .
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Old 12-27-2008, 04:17 AM   #10
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Thanks all! Im all very good with coming up with ideas - as for the following them up with a flesh out and actually writing the story - i suck big time.

Last edited by Grey_Wolf : 12-27-2008 at 04:19 AM.
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Old 12-27-2008, 05:23 AM   #11
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Well, if that is the case and you are not going to attempt it because you will fail anyway, why bother to ask us what we think?
Obviously you must have felt something promising in this story, otherwise you would not have wanted to write it in the first place, right?
Now stop making excuses and get to it! >_<

The above is probably the prelude to the story of that champion of yours. Who is it? Is it a he or a she? What is his/her background? What will he/she have to do? Where will he/she end? How will he/she start being the champion? Or was he/she always the champion?
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Old 12-27-2008, 06:55 AM   #12
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Grey_Wolf View Post
Thanks all! Im all very good with coming up with ideas - as for the following them up with a flesh out and actually writing the story - i suck big time.
But ideas are only the very start. If you want to get better at fleshing out the stories and characters beyond the vague first idea, you've got to practise! Writing is all about working out the original idea into something bigger. And it will get easier with exercising. Ideas are good, but not enough to have a good story.

I know it's a daunting task to go from a single idea to a fully fletched story. The thing with stories is that you can easily build on them, you can add or remove bits as the story grows. But you've got to start somewhere.

Pick a single scene, like say where the Guardians are discussing what to do after the death of the king and how they'll decide to split up the magical armour. Then start thinking about how many Guardians there'd be, what kind of people they'd be, defining characteristics, looks, from which side of the country they are, etc... And then just try to write the dialogue to see how that meeting goes. And as you think things through, you'll find out you've discovered a lot more things about this world than you knew before. And then you'll have a more solid basis to continue the story.
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Old 12-27-2008, 07:16 AM   #13
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What might really help you is deciding what you want to say to the world. That's a big reason to write a story... because you want to get a message across.

Often times you can know what you want to get across, it's just finding the right environment for showing that quality. For example, I know I've wanted to tell a story about how love can be twisted to create something terrible, but I haven't known how to write it. Well I recently had an idea (not much more fleshed out than the one you've presented above) and realized that I could use that setting to tell the story that I've been wanting to tell for a year or more.

Just think about all of the GOOD stories you've read.

I mean, for me, when I finish the average Forgotten Realms book or what not, I put it down and think "well that was enjoyable, but a bit worthless." When I finish a really good book I feel like its made me think about something important.

A good book has something to it... maybe multiple things about it... that makes you think. For instance I just finished Good Omens by Niel Gamon and Terry Pratchet, and what I got out it was that it made me think about how "good" or "bad" people are in relation to the goals they're after.


What do you want to say?

Maybe, just as an example, you want to say that absolute power corrupts absolutely. Maybe your guardian finding all of this armor is just a brief prelude, and the real story is about how things he encounters while seeking the armor begin to corrupt him, and once he has the full power of the armor under his control he begins a reign of controlled terror.

Or maybe you want to say how important it is for people to be brave and stand up for what they believe. Maybe your story is about a group of people who help the champion along the way to recovering the armor. They'll never receive the glory for what they've done, but they'll have their kingdom and their freedom when all they've ever known before is the oppression: Try to make a point of what a precious commodity freedom is.

Last edited by Tessar : 12-27-2008 at 07:20 AM.
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Old 12-27-2008, 10:27 AM   #14
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Thanks again! Im sorry that I was about to give up.

Well I'll try to do my best - really think thru the story and characters.

Thanks again.
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Old 03-17-2009, 08:44 PM   #15
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This was a really great beginning, Doc. The opening hook was just that. It hooked the reader. I, myself, when developing a story write in pen then transfer it to computer. There are times I write separate scenes as they come to me. Creating profiles for your characters, like Hector suggested, may help you. Don't give up. A story is like a child, nurture it and it will grow.
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