Comments on my poems plz

Squirrel · 09-23-2005, 09:36 PM

i would appreciate any comments on these poems!!!

Suicidal Rose

Sees the sky
Prays to die
Or to see
Another way free
Holds the knife
Says bye to life
Beside a rose bud
Soiled with blood
A small cry
No way to lie
Time to die
Just say bye
Take the rose
Hold it close
Think of me
I'll be free

Nothing's Wrong

Nothing's wrong
But nothing's right
In this night
I don't belong
Dwelling on fears
Left to cry
And wonder why
I'm still here
Let myself fall
All are gone
Left all alone
None to call
Can't leave behing
What's been done
Nowhere to run
No peace to find

09-23-2005, 09:36 PM	#1
Squirrel Hobbit Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: Georgia Posts: 23	Comments on my poems plz i would appreciate any comments on these poems!!! Suicidal Rose Sees the sky Prays to die Or to see Another way free Holds the knife Says bye to life Beside a rose bud Soiled with blood A small cry No way to lie Time to die Just say bye Take the rose Hold it close Think of me I'll be free Nothing's Wrong Nothing's wrong But nothing's right In this night I don't belong Dwelling on fears Left to cry And wonder why I'm still here Let myself fall All are gone Left all alone None to call Can't leave behing What's been done Nowhere to run No peace to find __________________ [COLOR=DarkSlateBlue][FONT=Comic Sans MS] To the Hobbit Hole I Go

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