Not For Arda

[Willow Oran]

Galadriel returned his smile, shaking her head at his questions, "Can happiness be judged by a week, brother? Love, too, is not so definable as I think you believe.
That is, it does not strike each person the same way. Your love for Amárië was obvious, for placed together in a room the two of you behaved as if robbed of any sense but for each other.
The love I feel for Celeborn, and he for me, is more subtle than that; it took me long to recognize it and when I did, I did not speak for pride," she paused, considering her next words carefully, "To answer whether or not we are happy... No. We are not. We have married secretly during a time of uncertain peace with the anticipation of many long years of seperation and worry made bitter by slander from both our peoples. We know well that we will find no happiness for a very long time.
Yet we are content, for we challange each other as no others will dare and in each other's company we have found deep understanding and necessary solace. I cannot say if that is love, and I suspect that it is not by your definition, but I believe it will be enough."

[Curufin]

'Who am I to dare to define what love is for you, sister? I know well what it means to me, but beyond that, I dare not say. If you say that you love him, then I shall take you at your word.'

A darkness came over his eyes, and he was silent for a moment.

'Happiness may not be your doom, sister, but foresight tells me that you shall not soon be separated. The path to your future may be filled with hardships, but you and Celeborn shall suffer them together, and from you will come the hope of the Kingdoms of Men in generations hence.'

He turned away, and paced the room a bit.

'Do you ever regret having come here, sister?'

[Willow Oran]

Galadriel rose and crossed to him, slipping her hand through his as she often had when they were young and she still the baby sister, insistant on toddling after her brothers, a gesture of thanks, for hearing his prophecy had relieved much worry.
"I have never regretted coming," she said, leaning her head on his shoudler, "But always the manner in which we came. It should have been different."

[Curufin]

Findaráto squeezed her hand, then pulled her into a tight embrace, kissing the top of her head. Listening to her words, he sighed.

'Should have been different, perhaps. But could it have been different? I do not know that the Eldar know the answer to that question. Would the Valar have let us go if we had asked, or would they have counselled us against it? I do not think that they would forbid, but wise counsel could have taken hold in calmer circumstances. Nay, sister, I do not think the road could have been different for us. If we had not been calmer, and less filled with rage and rebellion, then I do not think we would have left in the first place. As for me, I do not regret leaving. I miss Amárië, but I know also that she understands why I had to go.'

He kissed the top of her head again, then let her go.

'Will your husband know that you are here? I could, perhaps, send scouts to find him.'

[Willow Oran]

"I would not have you risk their lives," Galadriel said, spirit lightening now that she had at least one brother's acceptance, "Celeborn knows to find me here... yet I would rest easier knowing that he was looked for. Just in case."

[Curufin]

'Perhaps I shall send just one scout - one of my best. He shall find Celeborn, and help him if he may. And you shall stay here and allow me to dote on you - it is not often that I can dote on my baby sister when she is always away in Doriath! I shall have my cook fix your favorite meal tomorrow, I think. If it is the same as it has always been?'

[Willow Oran]

She laughed, "My brother, however many times I may change my name or," she looked wryly at her 're-decorated' room, "my surroundings; my favorite meal will remain unchanged and you may dote on me, so long as I may mother you. Now to bed! Or you will be swooning at the breakfast table and Aikanáro will skewer me with his glare for causing you grief!" She said, shooing him gently in the direction of his chambers.
Alone in her room once more Galadriel surveyed the chaos she had earlier wrought and sighed. Forgiven, the air in the room did not seem so suffocating as before. She tested the bed and then restored the blankets to their proper places a top it and slid beneath them. She would find wall hangings in more subtle colors come the day. For now, this would do.

[Curufin]

Findaráto felt a great deal of relief that the feud with his sister had been mended so quickly. He did not enjoy fighting with her - she was too dear to him, and he was not good at dealing with such negative emotions.

He was tired, Artanis was right about that, but somehow he doubted sleep would come easily. There was too much to think about. Entering the corridor where his chambers were located, he heard steps on the stone floor and looked up to see his brother, pacing the halls.

'Aikanáro, you are still awake? Join me. We shall talk without interruption this time.'

[Aikanáro]

Aikanáro looked up with a start as his thoughts were interrupted. It was only Findaráto, he realized, no doubt as restless as he was after all he had heard that day.

'It is difficult to sleep, with my thoughts as unsettled as they are,' he admitted. 'You spoke well to Artanis, and yet her marriage troubles me greatly.' That Aikanáro had managed to keep his temper earlier had perhaps made the situation even worse. Pent-up anger was not something he dealt with easily.

He abandoned his pacing, walked slowly over to his brother. 'What are we to do about it, Findaráto? We must do something.'

Of his own situation, Aikanáro made no mention. He did not know what else to say of the matter, to discuss their sister was, for now, simpler.

[Curufin]

'I fear there is nothing to be done, brother. Our sister has made her choice and there is little we can do to oppose it. It is best if we simply accept it as her will.'

He paused, looking at his brother a long moment.

'But Artanis is not all that concerns you. Come, we shall finish our earlier conversation.'

[Aikanáro]

'And then it will seem to this Celeborn that what he has done is acceptable...' Aikanáro trailed off.

'You are right, of course,' he said then, 'that is not merely Artanis that keeps me awake. But as for the other,' he explained wearily, 'there are no answers. I cannot change what I feel, Findaráto, nor can I ignore it. Perhaps you are right also in saying that such a desire, such a love is unwise - but it exists now, and that cannot be undone. Even should I turn away, my heart must be forever hers.'

[Curufin]

'And yet turn away you must,' Findaráto said gently yet firmly, sitting in his chair and steepling his hands while looking at his brother with pity. 'If you truly love her then you will understand that pursuing such a course can only end in misery for both of you. Oh, perhaps not at once, but the time will come when she grows old and you are still young, when your very presence will be a pain to her; a constant reminder of her weakness. So quickly they fade, these children of Men, so brief their lives! And while we may love them, any union with them will be filled with sadness.'

[Aikanáro]

'You think I do not know this?' Aikanáro asked quietly, trying to keep his voice from sounding shaky, but unable to disguise the pain in his eyes. 'That the highest and greatest joy I have known is not also such a sorrow, that her life - my Andreth's life - is but a flicker compared to all the ages we who are Eldar might live? You think I would not do anything to alter it?'

He sighed, heavily, and continued, 'But I cannot, Findaráto, I must watch as she grows old, and though my love for her will not diminish, I fear her regard for me might. I wish it were not so. It seems misery must be our lot, in the end, whatever I do now.'

[Curufin]

Findaráto raised an eyebrow in suprise.

'Why do you fear that her love for you will fade, Aikanáro? Of the two of you, surely she is the one who is getting the better bargain? A lover who shall never grow old, the grandson of the King of the Ñoldor? Nay, brother, you do not give yourself enough credit.'

He paused, looking at his hands pensively.

'I cannot tell you how to behave on this manner, Aikanáro. It is neither my place nor my desire to do so. Ultimately, the decision is yours. The Eldar know little of such matters - the Atani are new to us in their entirety.'

[Aikanáro]

'I know that my own love will not,' he explained, 'but I am not the one who will have to face the bitterness of mortality, and bitter it is to them. As you have said, I may remind her of that, immortal as I am.'

He had thought that they might look beyond that, be not simply Elda and Atan to each other, but find a connection which transcended even such a great divide. But was that not overly ambitious of him? Would he hurt her, by reaching for something that could not be?

'It is a decision I alone must take,' Aikanáro agreed with his brother then, 'but I am glad of your counsel, for were there not such doubts in my mind I would not have asked for it. I must reflect upon it further, I suppose.'

[Curufin]

Findaráto nodded. There would need to be further discussion on this in the future, but now was not the time.

'May I ask, brother, what does she call you?'

[Aikanáro]

'To her people,' Aikanáro answered, 'I am Aegnor. But Andreth,' he continued with a sorrowful smile, 'she calls me Aikanár.'

He was not certain why Findaráto has asked, but he did not think it mattered. To tell his brother this reminded Aikanáro suddenly of that day when she had first addressed him so, that walk they had taken together in the late afternoon. He sighed.

'Brother, perhaps you ought to take rest now?' he asked. Even if he could not sleep that was not reason to keep Findaráto up through all the night's hours with him!

[Willow Oran]

When Galadriel woke the next morning she felt lighter. Some thoughtful maid had already been in, filling a bath and lighting the lamps in the room.
The ripped wall hangings, Galadriel noticed as she shed her soiled travel wear which she had been too tired to change out of ere sleeping and stepped into the still warm water, had been removed.

An hour later, clean and with her hair almost dry, she finished dressing, her gown simple, light blue-green wool with a sash of silver, she needed no other adornment, and left for the Great Hall, wondering if her brothers had yet awakened.

[Curufin]

Findaráto always arose early, no matter how difficult his night had been. He had slept well, dreams full of Valinor and Amárië - as they often were - and rose feeling refreshed. He dressed in a silver tunic with blue leggings, tying the cross-garters while his mind wandered. Artanis had shocked him yesterday with her revelations, but it was done, and it would work out in the end.

Aikanáro's problem was not quite so simple.

A mortal woman!

Findaráto held nothing against the atani, rather he was actually quite fond of them. But he could barely conceive of all the miseries and disasters that could come from marrying one. The few short years they would have together could never be enough to account for the eternal sundering that would come all too soon.

He pulled his hair back and clubbed it, not feeling the need to have it in his face today, and made for the Hall.

[Willow Oran]

Galadriel brightened to see her eldest brother in the passage ahead of her, "Good morning, Findaráto!" she called, and sped her pace to catch up with him
"I heard you meet Aikanáro otuside my door last night, is he still of a mind to lock me away and throw away the key?" she asked, jesting, for she trusted Findaráto's ability to convince their brother of the folly of such a plan.
Linking her arm in his she continued, "What brings Aikanáro to Nargothrond, anyway? I had thought that he and Angaráto were busy hunting in the North."