Knee-slappers

[azalea]

Here's something that wasn't meant to be funny, but it made me chuckle -- in Queer Lodgings, Gandalf tells them how he followed Beorn and had to swim across the river. It put a funny picture in my head of Gandalf swimming freestyle across the river in the dead of night with his staff and grey cloak, etc. Swimming is not one of those activities I readily picture him doing!

[kiwi52291]

one of my favorites is: "...and sat down in a hurry. He missed the stool and sat in the fender, knocking over the poker and shovel with a crash."

[The Gaffer]

It's all in the voices. "Lazy lob", if said correctly, can make most people laugh (admittedly at you rather than with you).

An ultra-sleazy mien, hand wringing and slavering: "WHAT HAS IT GOT IN ITS POCKETSES?"

[Tuor of Gondolin]

Bilbo/Smaug discussion is also great:

ex.

"I suppose you got a fair price for that cup last night?" he went on. "Come now, did you? Nothing at all! Well, that's just like them. And I suppose they are skulking outside, and your job is to do all the dangerous work and get what you can when I'm not looking - for them?.....

"Truly songs and tales fall utterly short of the reality, O Smaug the Chieftest and Greatest of Calamities," replied Bilbo.
"You have nice manners for a thief and a liar," said the dragon.

"I don't know if it has occurred to you that, even if you could steal the gold bit by bit - a matter of a hundred years or so - you could not get very far? Not much use on the mountain side? Not much use in the forest? Bless me! Have you never thought of the catch? A fourteenth share.....But what about delivery? What about cartage? What about armed guards and trolls?.....You will hardly believe it, but poor Bilbo was really taken very aback......

"I have always understood," said Bilbo in a frightened squeak, "that dragons were softer underneath, especially in the region of the - er - chest.".....

"Never laugh at live dragons, Bilbo you fool!" he said to himself, and it became a favourite saying of his later, and passed into a proverb.

[Nimbrennil]

MY favorite parts:

"Good morning," said Bilbo...

"What do you mean?" [Gandalf] said. "Do you wish me a good morning, or do you mean it is a good morning whether I want it or not; or that you feel good this morning; or that it is a morning to be good on?"

"All of them at once," said Bilbo...

LOL that makes me laugh all the time

(Bilbo feels uncomfortable, so he says,...)

"Good morning!" ...

"What a lot of things you do use 'Good morning' for!" said Gandalf. "Now you mean that you want to get rid of me, and it won't be good until I move off."

LOL

So that's all but I think they are funny !

[Nurvingiel]

I absolutely love all the parts you guys have mentioned!

In addition, I love the whole scene where Gandalf turns up and defeats the Trolls!

Starting with this quote:

'Just when a wizard would have been most useful, too,' groaned Dori and Nori (who shared the hobbit's views about regular meals, plenty and often).

I don't have the Hobbit with me, anyone care to post the rest of that scene?

[cee2lee2]

I've just finished re-reading The Hobbit so it's been great fun reading all of your favorite comedic parts. I laughed at them, too, and really enjoyed the book again. Bilbo's conversation with Smaug is one of my favorite scenes.

[Nerdanel]

Originally posted by Rosie Gamgee

And when Bombur falls asleep in Mirkwood, cuz he fell in the water that they weren't supposed to touch.

Oh, I can see how pleased he looks in his deep sleep when the other dwarves have to carry him

I like when Bilbo shouts at the spiders "Attercrop! Attercrop!" and they get totally P.O.ed.

That's hilarious. Guess it wasn't for Bilbo nor for the poor dwarves hanging in the trees.lol!

When they ride down the river in the empty barrels (the whole thing with the two drunk elves is funny. Hard to imagine a drunk elf, though). Bilbo forgetting that there was no one to pack him into a barrel, and now he has to hang onto one of them.

I never thought elves were drunk before I read the Hobbit!! It's hilarious. It takes some of the respect I've had for them away though..
And Bilbo forgetting.. That's exactly what I would have forgotten too! And it can't have been too funny to ride a barrel in the ice cold water..

I also laughed hysterically when I read how golf was invented. You learn something new every day, don't you?

[Last Child of Ungoliant]

tolkien was an amazingly funny writer!

my funniest bit is prob.
the troll scene, or the arrival at beorn's house

[Rían]

I think the golf story tops everything! Hysterical!

And all those other things are so funny, too! Around our house, we all say "eggses" and "pocketses" now

[BeardofPants]

Originally Posted by RÃ*an

And all those other things are so funny, too! Around our house, we all say "eggses" and "pocketses" now

Yeah, the poor BF gets subjected to that. *What's in his pocketses....* When I'm looking for bus money.

[Olmer]

Originally Posted by Nerdanel

I never thought elves were drunk before I read the Hobbit!! It's hilarious. It takes some of the respect I've had for them away though..

To make it more visual here is a picure of drunk Thranduil with Bilbo in the back, trying to sneak out.
Done by Maria Lombige Ezpeleta.
Thranduil

[Nerdanel]

thanks for that picture, Olmer!

lol! i think it looks like he has jeans on.. maybe not.

no.. that's wrong.. that's transferring humanity to other creatures! always will my image of elves be destroyed..

[Haradrim]

my favorite part has got to be the part where Gandalf says to the dwarves, "After all he is my friend and not a bad little chap. i feel responsible for him. I wish to goodness you had not lost him."

The last line always cracks me up. Poor Dori

[Telcontar_Dunedain]

Originally Posted by Shadowfax

*Oh, and I just thought of another one...the origin of GOLF!

"[Old Took's great-grand-uncle Bullroarer] charged the ranks of the goblins of Mount Gram in the Battle of the Green Fields, and knocking their king Golfimbul's head clean off with a wooden club. It sailed a hundred yards through the air and went down a rabbit-hole, and in this way the battle was won and the game of Golf invented at the same moment."

I like that one to. I can just imagine it hehehe.

[Haradrim]

I love how a lot of TOlkiens funniest lines from the Hobbit are totally out of context to whats going on. It sjust these little tidbits which are very funny. Man that guy was a genius.

[Telcontar_Dunedain]

I like when the dwarfs escape Mirkwood out of the barrels. I can just get apicture in my head of 13 dwarfs stuffed in to 13 barrels hehehehe.

[Haradrim]

That has the makings of a funny song......

thirteen dwarves in thirteen barrels
riding down the river to get to Dale
They were captured by the elves
and now their running
thirteen dwarves in thirteen barrels......