Lyrd Of The Ryngs - The Homies

[Grey_Wolf]

"I said: I didn't drive all the way from Hobbiton for you to fill my ears with this rubbish. I could just as well go to Mount Doom Inc's head office and to hear that kind of propgaganda."

"He replied: I see that you do not agree with wise course. Well, Sauron will be well pleased at the delay of one of his dreaded enemies if not the actual hindrance and capture of that enemy. Guards, escort our visitor to the top of the Tower. See to it that he cannot escape."

"Then a couple of goons grabbed hold of me and dragged me up to the topmost room of Orthanc."

[Nurvingiel]

"Did he baffle you with coloured strobe lights?" asked Frodo at the conclusion of Gandalf's tale. "Maybe he forced you into a staff duel and you threw each other around the room?"
Gandalf looked at him oddly. "Of course not! Magic is subtle, not laughable. Whatever gave you such a ridiculous idea?"
"I... erm... I'm not sure," Frodo said lamely.
"Well no matter," Gandalf said kindly, "Even I can be caught by surprise. But I won't allow Saruman to catch me unawares again!"
"The Enemy has many spies at his command. His arm has grown long," said Elrond. Frodo pictured a sort of evil Gumby with stretched out arms and shuddered inwardly. The other members of the Council looked grave, except Boromir, who fidgeted.

[Grey_Wolf]

"Now that all has been told that needs to be told about the story of the Package up to now we must decide what to do with it."

"Frodo, bring forth the Package so that everybody might see the Peril of the West."

Frodo felt a weird sensation in his stomach and a strange reluctance to reveal the Package but did so anyway.

[Telcontar_Dunedain]

Yet Galdor was not satisfied at Gabdalfs explanation.

"How then did you escape? For I am sure Saruman didn't call you a taxi," he said.

"No. When I met Radagast I told him to tell all planes and choppers that he is friends with to find all they can and report it to Isengard. He did this knowing no reason not to. Then in the depths of a night the most silent and fastest aeroplanes found me on the top of Orthanc. He set me down in Rohan where Prime Minister Theoden bid me take a horse and begone. So I took the finest horse and tamed him. I rode to the Shire and reached it while Frodo was with Tom Bombadil. I then came to Bree only a day after Frodo. I found out out from the bartender at the Pony that Frodo had left the day before with Strider. This news was a blessing to me though the bartender knew not and I could have my first decent night's sleep knowing Frodo was in good hands. However my heart was still not at ease and galloped to Weathertop Cafe like a gale, reaching it twos days out from Bree. The lawyers came at me and I was hard put to escape. I then sent Shadowfax back to Rohan as I could not ride him from Weathertop to Rivendell and that journey took me a fortnight. That is all that is happened up 'til now," he said. "Better?" he snapped at Galdor.

[Nurvingiel]

Slightly awestruck, Frodo stepped forward and cautiously removed the Package from inside his waistcoat, and placed it on the coffee table in the centre of the room.

[Grey_Wolf]

"Lo! The Package of Legend." muttered Boromir."Is truly the Doom of Gondor come at last."

[Telcontar_Dunedain]

"Not the Doom of Gondor," said Aragorn. "For the verse said the Doom, not the Doom of Gondor. I fear this war will effect more than just Gondor."

[Grey_Wolf]

"The Time," elrond said,"has now truly come to decide what to to with The Package."

"It is my opinion that it must be destroyed." said Gandalf.
"It cannot stay here. Rivendell would become like an island under siege and after a short while it would succumb and then Sauron would come to claim his prize."

"Can't we use it against the Enemy?" asked Boromir.
"If it's so powerful, as you claim."

"No, we cannot use the device of the Enemy against him." said Aragorn."We'll risk becomming like him. Evil Lawyers (shudders at the thought)."

"Well," said Elrond," who then shall take the Package to the Destruction Facility? And Who shall go with him as company?"

"With your leave, Elrond." said Gandalf."Me and Aragorn should go, it being his mission, and Boromir, as a Gondor representative. Legolas shall go for the elves, and Gimli for the dwarves. That is Five. Maybe you can find some suitable members from your staff to make up, to my thinking, the number of Nine. Nine walkers versus Nine Lawyers."

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Book 2.3: The Ring Goes South

[Telcontar_Dunedain]

'Well that won't do,' thought Frodo. 'Hobbits have bought it this far so it shall be a hobbit that takes it further'

"I shall take," said Frodo. "Although I do not have a map."

"If I have heard rightly (which is unlikely as my hearing is getting exetremley bad) then this task has been appointed to you, Galdor of the Havens." At this point one of the elves near Elrond got up and whispered something in his ear.
"My mistake, Frodo of the Shire," said Elrond. "I told you my hearing was going."

[Nurvingiel]

Sam had been listening to most of the council from his hiding place behind a setee. It had been a lot of talk and not much action, so he had drifted off to sleep a few times. But when Elrond started naming the company, he was outraged that some random staff members would go with Frodo, and not he!
"Frodo isn't going anywhere without me!" said Sam, coming out from behind the setee.

[Telcontar_Dunedain]

"Yes he is. He's going to Mordor," said Elrond.
"No he's not," said Sam.
"Yes he is," said Elrond.
"No he's not," said Sam.
"Yes he is," said Elrond.
"No he's not," said Sam.
"Yes he is," said Elrond.
"No he's not," said Sam.
"Yes he is," said Elrond.
"No h," said Sam but was cut short by Gandalf.
"ENOUGH," shouted Gandalf. "Elrond he can come." At this Sam pokes his tounge out at Elrond.
"If he's going we are to," cried Merry and Pippin running in.
"How did you get here?" asked Frodo. "You're not meant to find out about this until we tell you afterwards."
"Year, we know that. But try telling Peter Jackson," Merry replied.
"Well I would say you're not coming. But someone," at this Elrond looked at Gandalf. "Would just shout at me again."

[Nurvingiel]

"Besides," said Pippin, "You need someone of intelligence on this mission... you know what, I'm just not going to set myself up like that. Honestly."
"What we're trying to say is we've been with Frodo from the start. We're his friends, and we go together," said Merry.
"And if you don't let us come, we're just going to follow you," Pippin added determindly.

[Grey_Wolf]

"Well, we can't have you rushing about in the wilderness knowing what you do know." said Gandalf."And I heard someone saying that you'll need someone with intelligence on this mission. Well, I'm coming along. To keep an eye on you guys amongst other things."

"But you needn't worried so much the final decision on the four last ones has been made. Sam will go as Frodo's companion, Merry and you will also go as Representatives of The Hobbits."

"As for the time of going. We're going in about a fortnight.
We got to know about the status of the Lawyers before we definitely set out."

"All right!" shouted the hobbits.

"Now take it easy. There's lots of time to laze before we go. And we Grown ups will stock up and prepare for the trip and decide upon the mode of transport."

[Nurvingiel]

"Your snide comments about our height will be graciously ignored," said Sam, glaring.
"Hey, what do I get to represent," said Pippin.
"Beer," replied Merry.
"Yes, beer," said Frodo and Sam in unison. Boromir walked over to the hobbits.
"Hey... so since we're the... erm, this may seem trivial, but does our company have a name?"
"Yes, it's only fitting since we're charged with such an important quest," Aragorn said.
"What is our quest," Pippin said quietly to Sam, "We weren't here for that part."
"Take the Package to Mount Doom and destroy it," he whispered.
"In what, the Garbage Compactor of Doom?" said Merry, a bit incedulously.
"Well, we're th- what are you whispering about over there," said Aragorn.
"How exactly are we going to destroy the package?" said Frodo.

[Grey_Wolf]

"That'll probably happen as it happens, the route to the Garbage Compactor lies across the Plains of Gorgoroth." Aragorn said.
"As for the name I think The Homies of the Package would do nicely."

"Yeah!" the hobbits shouted enthusiastically."That's great."

[Nurvingiel]

"You mean... the Garbage Compactor is Doom is real?" said Merry in disbelief.
"Very real," Elrond said sternly, "And the only way to destroy the Package." Frodo looked grave.
"Hey, relax Frodo," said Sam. "We're the Homies! And nobody messes with my Homies."

[Telcontar_Dunedain]

The hobbits had two weeks of relaxsation in Rivendell. They expierenced the spas and saunas and most importantly to the hobbits, the Last Homely Pub which was next door to the Last Homely Hospital. By the time it came to set out the hobbits were fully rested and fully stocked up with pipe-weed.

One evening Frodo found himself alone with Bilbo in his room.
"Well Frodo my lad. I would like you to have these," he said producing a soldering iron and what looked to be a bullet proof piece of armour. "You weapon was broken and there is no time to fix it so I though you might have my soldering iron, Sting and some solder."
"Yes, thanks Bilbo," replied Frodo.
"Also, my bullet proof armour, mithril. It was given to me by Thorin."
"But I would not look right in it," said Frodo.
"Put it under your normal clothes. No one will ever know," said Bilbo, his eyes shifting. With that Frodo put it on underneath his jacket and his chest looked all bulky.
"See," said Bilbo. "Invisble to the naked eye."

The Homies set out with few weapons as their hope was in secrecy and not warfare. Aragorn had the power drill of Isildur reforged and renamed it Anduril, Flame of the West. Boromir took a power drill similar to Aragorns but of less battery power. He also took a shield and a megaphone.
"GOODBYE RIVENDELL," he yelled into his megaphone.
"Slow you shall be to shout into that mega phone again Boromir," said Elrond. "Until you near your own borders again."
"I always shout into my megaphone before a journeys start. That way I do not set out as a thief in the dark," replied Boromir.
Gandalf took his ancient soldering iron, Glamdring and Frodo took only Sting and his bullet proof mithril which remained as Bilbo wish almost invisble to the naked eye. Sam kept his hammer from the Barrow Downs and Merry and Pippin kept their crow bars. They all also took a cell phone from Rivendell with 100 free text message and 500 minutes each as gifts from Elrond.

[Grey_Wolf]

Their farwells had been said in the Cafeteria and they were now only waiting for Gandalf, who had not yet come out of the house. A gleam of fluorescent light came from the Great Exit of the Last Homely Hospital.

Bilbo huddled close to Frodo just outside. Aragorn sat on a couch, his head bowed to his knees. Only Elrond knew fully what this hour meant to him. The others could be seen as grey shadows in the darkness.

Sam was standing by the ATV Billy (which had been upgraded with an Artificial Intelligence module) and stood parked, engine ticking over.
Sam eased the pack onto the back of Bill and went over anxiously in his mind
all the things he had stowed in it, wondering if he had forgotten anything; his chief treasure, the cooking gear, and the little box of salt that he always carried and refilled when he could, a good supply of pipeweed (but not enough, he thought miserably), flint and tinder, woollen hose; linen; and various small belongings of his master's that Frodo had forgotten and Sam had stowed to bring them out in triumph when they were called for. He went through them all.

"Rope." he muttered."No rope. And only last night you said to yourself: "Sam, what about a bit of rope. You'll want it if you haven't got it." Well, I want it
and I can't get it now."

[Grey_Wolf]

At that moment, Elrond came out with Gandalf, and called the Homies to him.

"This is my last word." he said in a low voice."The Packageer is setting out on the Mission of Destroying the Package. On him the alone is the duty to hold onto it. Neither to cast away or deliver it to any of the Enemy. Only other Homies are allowed to handle it and Members of the Meeting and then only in gravest need. The others go with him as free companions, so you must help him on the way. You may tarry, or come back, or turn aside into other paths, as chance allows. The further you go, the less easy it will be to withdraw. yet no oath or bond is laid on you to go further than you will. For you do not yet know the strenght of your hearts, and you cannot foresee what each may meet upon the road."

"Faithless is he that says farewell when the road darkens." said Gimli.

"Maybe." said Elrond."But let him not vow to walk in the dark, who has not seen the nightfall."

"Yet sworn word may strengthen quaking heart." said Gimli.

"Or break it." said Elrond."Look not to far ahead! But go now with good hearts!
Farewell, and may the blessing of Elves and Men and all Free Folk go with you. May the stars shine upon your faces."

"Good...good luck!" cried Bilbo, stuttering with cold."I don't suppose you'll be able to keep a datapad at hand, Frodo my lad, but I shall expect a full account when you get back. And don't be to long. Farewell!"

Many others of Elrond's household stood in the shadows and watched them go, bidding them farewell with soft voices. There was no laughter, and no song and music. At last they turned away, only the silenced engine of Bill being heard, and faded silently into the dusk.

They crossed the bridge and wound slowly up the long steep paths that led out of the cloven vale of Rivendell; and they came at length to the high moor where the wind hissed through the heather. Then with one glance at the Last Homely Hospital twinkling below them they strode away far into the night.

[Telcontar_Dunedain]

Gandalf led the Homies. Behind him came Frodo, then Legolas and Gimli followed by the three younger hobbits and Bill the Quad who was being taken for lugage. Boromir was behind them and Aragorn was walking grimly at the rear.
"Look," asid Sam to Merry and Pippin. "Mr. Frodo's been working out. Look at his chest," he said in amazment.
Many days the Homies walked on and to all save Gandalf and Aragorn, the scenary seemed not to change.