Lyrd Of The Ryngs - The Homies

[Telcontar_Dunedain]

OOC: Okay *edits*

[Grey_Wolf]

The chanting ceased. Frodo, having closed his eyes for a few moments, opened them again and saw Bilbo seated on his stool in a circle of listeners, who were laughing and applauding, holding their mp3-players up to record what was being said.

"Now we had better have it again." said an Elf.

Bilbo got up and bowed.
"I'm flattered, Lindir." he said."But it would be too tiring to repeat it all."

"Not too tiring for you." the Elves answered, laughing."You know you never get tired of reciting your own verses. But really we cannot answer your question at one hearing."

"What!" cried Bilbo."You can't tell which parts where mine and which were the Dúnadan's."

"It's not easy for us to tell the difference between two mortals." said the Elf.

"Nonsense, Lindir." snorted Bilbo."If you can't tell the difference between a man's words and that of a hobbit, your judgement is poorer than I imagined. They're as different as peas and apples."

"Maybe. To sheep other sheep no doubt appear different." laughed Lindir."Or to shepherds. But Mortals have not been out study. We have other business."

"I won't argue with you." said Bilbo."I sleepy after so much chanting and discussing. I leave you to do your guessing, if you want to."

occ: We're closing in on the all important Meeting in Chapter Two of Book Two of FOTR.

[Telcontar_Dunedain]

"Hey Frodo. Do you want to slip out and a have a little chat," said Bilbo.
"Can we?" asked Frodo.
"Sure. This is a party, not a business meeting. They're saving that for tomorrow," Bilbo replied.
As they walked out Frodo saw Aragorn and Elrond break dancing while Arwen watched.

[Grey_Wolf]

They went to Bilbo's personal room and sat down by the nice fireplace which was kept the room at a warm and comfortable temperature. There they chatted about their different adventures and Frodo's own adventurous trip so far.

Later in the evening Bilbo saw Frodo off to bed, it being the night before the Great Meeting To Decide What To Do With The Package, he and Bilbo had to be well rested.

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Book 2.2: The Council of Elrond

[Telcontar_Dunedain]

The next morning Frodo awoke and found Bilbo and Gandalf talking outside. Just at that moment their three pagers (which everyone in Rivendell was issued) went off. The simulataneously (sp.) walked towards the waiting room where Frodo had met Merry and Pippin the previous day.

As Frodo stepped in he noticed that many people of whom he knew where already there. There was Elrond in his white jacket and his stethoscope hanging from his neck. Aragorn was there sitting apart from the others, near only to another strange man. There was Glor(y)findel holding his stomach and shooting evil glances at the still black eyed Arwen who was sitting next o her father. Also there was Gloin, sitting with a younger dwarf.
"Welcome Frodo," said Elrond as Frodo walked in. "I see your pagers all work," he said then turning to everyone else he said, "Welcome one and all to The Great Meeting To Decide What To Do With The Package!"

[Grey_Wolf]

"First we'll introduce a few new-comers." said Elrond.
"This is Legolas, an forester Elf of Mirkwood Sawmill Inc, sent here by his father, the EO. Then there is Gimli, of the Lonely Skyscraper. Boromir, of the Minas Tirith Architectural Firm, also sent here by his father, the EO."

[Grey_Wolf]

Now not all that was spoken and debated at the Meeting need now be told.
Much was said of events in the world outside, especially in the South, and in the wide lands east of the mountains. Of these things Frodo had already heard many rumours; but the tale of Gloin was new to him, and when the Dwarf spoke he listened attentively. It appeared that amid the splendour of their works of hand the hearts of the Dwarves of the Loney Skyscraper were troubled.

[Telcontar_Dunedain]

"Since the death of Smaug the Fraud the weekly income of the Lonely Skyscraper as continually tripelled. It is now no longer Dain only who is a millionaire. Yet 30 years ago things made a small and what seemed inconvieniant turn for the worse. Balin took some dwarves to Moria in search of greater wealth. At first news was good but then there was no news at all. Then recently riders have come, yet not from Moria. From Mordor! They asked for news of a Package. Just a lowly package that Sauron the Great desired. Twice more has he came since then. Dain sent me here to ask for the councils of Elrond HalfSurgeon!"

[Grey_Wolf]

"You have done well to come here." said Elrond."You will hear today all that you need to in order to understand the purposes of the Enemy. There is nothing you can do but resist, with hope or without it. But you don't stand alone. You will learn that your trouble is but part of the trouble of all the western world. The Package! What shall we do with the Package, this least of things that Sauron fancies? That is the decision that we must make.

Now, therefore, things shall be openly spoken that had been hidden from all
but a few until this day. And first, so that all may understand what is the
peril, the Tale of the Package shall be told from the beginning even to this present. And I will begin that tale, though others shall end it."

[Telcontar_Dunedain]

"It all began in the Second Age. Sauron, pupil at Morgoth's School of Evil, arose and declared war against the Elves of Eregion. It was not long until Elendil and his people declared war against Sauron and allied with Gil-galad and the Noldor."

[Rosie Gamgee]

"But they defeated Sauron- or so they thought. Unfortunately, he had a subsidiary company called Necromancer, and got away with not filing banckrupcy. Instead he poured all his funds into rebuilding the delapitated Dol Gildur plant, seeking ever at the same time for his Package, which had not been destroyed in that big chemical fire that Elendil and his up-and-rising CEO-in-training son, Isildur, set to Sauron's old factories in Mordor. Isildur found it in one of the warehouses before they set the fire and took it for himself. But he, as you know, was killed in that head-on collision on the stretch of inter-realm highway between Arnor and Gondor, and the Package was lost..." On and on and half-cracked surgeon talked in his high-pitched cackling voice. He spoke of Packages and companies and skyscrapers and Vipers and lawsuits and courtrooms and bribes and dwarves and slimy creatures with webby hands and men and elves and orcs and.....

"Wake up!" Everyone woke with a start and a snort- Legolas with a snit and a "My hair!" Elrond looked ready to cry. "WHY weren't you LISTENING?!" he shouted, a finger poised theatrically.
But at once Boromir stood up, tall and proud- and for being only five-foot-three he did a pretty good job of it. "Give me leave, Master Elrond," he said, and the Half-Surgeon looked a little less ruffled (a little flattery never hurt anyone, Boromir must have supposed), "first to say more of my architechtural company, for verily from that company I come. And it would be well to know what passes there."
The Council settled back in their chairs, preparing for another nap.

[Rosie Gamgee]

Stifled yawns and snores punctuated Boromir's speech, but that did not deter him. He talked much of the integrity of his company- the failing to accept bribes from Mount Doom and others, and the legal conflict that arose between them. They didn't seem to be able to settle it in court, however, and had been reduced to oft-times armed skirmishes at construction sites. "This very year," Boromir said, shouting by this time to be heard over the snoring (at his yells some of them stirred and woke), "in the days of June, we were visiting a site in Ithilien, contracting to do some renovation work, when sudden conflict came upon us out of Mordor, and we and our scaffolding were swept away. We were quite outnumbered: a little troop of architects against a whole slew of gangsters in black pickup trucks- but it was not by numbers that we were defeated. A power was there that we have not felt before.

"Some said it could be seen, like a great black Viper, a dark Shadow under the moon...." Some of the Counsel fell asleep again as he described the fear that befell even the most doughty construction-worker. It threw all of them, Boromir said, into madness, and they jumped into their construction SUVs and high-tailed it for the River, where all but Boromir's battered pickup truck were carried away by the swollen flood. Only he, his brother, and two others were in the little Toyota- all the rest were lost.

It was this little muddy vehicle that Boromir claimed he had driven a hundred and ten days, stopping only for gas and food (he complained, additionally, that there were no McDenethor's to be found this far north and he had to settle for Arnor Fried Chicken). "But I do not seek hired elvish thugs to protect us from the gunmen of Mount Doom Co.," he declared, but his tone suggested strongly otherwise. "I come to ask for counsel and the unravelling of hard words. For the night before we were attacked in Ithilien, my brother had a strange dream, and it came to him again afterwards, and once to me.

"In this dream I thought I saw the eastern sky grow dark, but in the West a pale light l.ingered, and out of it I heard a voice, remote but clear, crying:

Seek for the Pants that were Ripped:
In Imladris they dwell;
There shall be hems taken in
Stronger than a Morgul-spell.
There shall be shown a token
That Doom is near at hand
For the Wearer of Isildur's Pants shall waken
And the Halfling forth shall stand."

ooc: I just had to get the Pant's Game in here somewhere.

[Telcontar_Dunedain]

"Here are the Pants that were Ripped," said Aragorn reaching down to the lower half of his body. "Okay, on second thought maybe I won't show you them, but I have another of Isildur's broken things." At this he prodice a Power Drill that had a big Chunk missing out of and he reached in again producing the missing peice.
"Who are you to wear Isildurs pants and posses his Power Drill," said Boromir questioningly.
Suddenly Bilbo stood up, obviously annoyed on Aragorn's behalf.

'All thats is gold is not blindingly yellow,
Not all those of wear suits are posh,
The old jacket that is tought does not rip (much)
Tough stains are not reached by the Washing Machine.
A match from the box shall be striken,
Yellow from the suit shall spring,
Renewed shall be Power Drill and Pants that were broken,
The demoted shall again be promoted.'

[Rosie Gamgee]

ooc: Teddy, that was hilarious!!

[Telcontar_Dunedain]

ooc: I should hope so the amount of time it took me!

[Grey_Wolf]

"Not very good perhaps, but to the point - if you need more beyond the world of Elrond. If that was worth the journey here than you better sit down and listen to the rest." he said and sat down with a snort.

"I made that up myself," he whispered to Frodo," for the Dúnedain, a long time ago when he first told me about himself. I almost wish that my adventures were not over, and that I could go with him when his day comes."

Aragorn smiled at him a then turned to Boromir again.
"For my part I forgive your doubt," he said,"Little do I resemble the giant posters of Elendil and Isildur as they hang in Denethor's offices. But I'm just lowly FBI-agent and a heir of Isildur, not Isildur himself. I've had a hard and long life. And the miles that lie between Gondor and here is but a small part of my journeys. I've travelled to many far and distant places, such as Rhûn and Harad where the stars are strange."

"But my home, as I have it, is in the North. For here the Heirs of Valandil has ever dwelt in a long unbroken line from father to son many generations. Our days have darkened, and we have dwindled; but ever The Power Drill has passed to a new Keeper. And this I will say to you , Boromir, ere I end, lonely men are we, of the FBI, persecutors - but persecutors ever of the hired men of the Enemy, for they are to be found in many places and not in Mordor alone."

[Telcontar_Dunedain]

"That may well be but I myself would like to hear more of Gandalf's tale. Why he was late for example," Frodo murmured to Bilbo.
"You speak for me also," said Galdor, Elf of the Havens. "What also of Saruman. Is he not learned in Ring lore."

[Grey_Wolf]

And then Gandalf spoke.
"I first of all apologise to Frodo for not being able to go with you from the beginning and my tale will explain how Gandalf the Grey was fooled into walking into a trap and actually detained by my boss, Saruman the White."

"I left a datapad with a message at The Prancing Pony with Barliman Butterbur. An unfortunate choice it now appears for a keeper of such important information."

"Anyway, this is what happened. In July I was on my way back from the East and nearing Hobbiton when I saw a stranger sitting by the road and I approached him."

"He was actually One of My Order. Radagast the Brown."

"He said: Oh, Gandalf, finally I find you. I was looking for a country by the uncouth name of Shire and has yet to find it."

"And I told him: be careful what you call it, because you're inside it's borders now and the inhabitants might take it wrong if they hear your discription of their land."

"Well, OK." he said."I'm on a mission for Saruman and he said that if you are in need of help you should go to Isengard and he and you could pool your information because it appears as if the Enemy is growing stronger and is soon about to unleash his great project."

"I will go but I have another mission which is more urgent just now."

"No. Go right away."

"I will."

[Nurvingiel]

"So I went," continued Gandalf, "And the short version is that Saruman was extremely annoyed at accidentally putting his favourite white robe in the colour wash."

"What's the long version?" asked Frodo.


OOC: The next poster can either do a long version, or have Gandalf give a curt reply and do a short version.

[Grey_Wolf]

"Well, the inquisitiveness of hobbits never cease to amaze me. Well, then here's the long version."

"As a arrived at Isengard there appeared to be a rock concert in progress, the "music" blasting the walls with horribly loud sounds."

"I rode up to the gate and was displeased to see some real punks standing guard outside with a getto-blaster at full volume on the ground."

"I rode past the supposed guards which didn't appear to care all that much about whether some got in or not."

"I knocked on the door and was let in by Saruman himself who was unusually pleased to see me."

"He said: Well, Gandalf, here you are and here you will remain."

"Why is that? I asked."

"And he answered: A new power is rising and the Elves and the Dwarves no longer keep up with the times. We should join this power. This is the Modern Times and there is no place for ancient devotion to Western Culture."