Do nazguls have to go to the bathroom? and other pointless questions - Page 5

Faramir · 08-09-2002, 12:17 AM

This is a strange but funny thread.

Christiana · 08-09-2002, 09:14 PM

hmm...could the istari wed?

***azalea*** · 08-10-2002, 02:20 PM

Only each other.

Christiana · 08-10-2002, 03:40 PM

lol!

Menelvagor · 08-10-2002, 03:55 PM

Why is there never any mention of poodles in Middle Earth?

Christiana · 08-10-2002, 06:08 PM

easy!there r:the werewolves!

Claenoic · 08-10-2002, 06:22 PM

Discuss what would happen if 4 hobbits, a spork, Shelob's great aunt, and a piece of corn-on-the-cob was placed in an arena.

Christiana · 08-10-2002, 06:41 PM

while the hobbits were eating the corn,sga would skewer them w/ the spork and eat them!

Willow Oran · 08-14-2002, 12:54 AM

Oooh! Random questions, fun! How many bottles of wine does it take to get a gathering of 100 elves drunk if the wine has 50% alchohol content and the elves have tolerances ranging from medium to high?

Treebeard's apprentice · 08-14-2002, 08:05 PM

50% alcohol content!!!? That's some wicked strong stuff.
To answer the question, though, I think we should need to find out the rate at which the elves would release the alcohol from their systems.

In other words: How do elves go to the bathroom and how many times an hour/ day/ week, and whatnot?

TinuvielChild · 08-14-2002, 11:35 PM

Well, the Lothlorien elves merely pee off the edges of their talans, and that's how they water the grass!

Sick, I know.

How is it that the elves could commit massive acts of incest and not end up with genetically defective children?

Christiana · 08-14-2002, 11:44 PM

example?

Menelvagor · 08-15-2002, 12:56 AM

Easy. elves don't have DNA, they are made up of a mixture of chocolate pudding and moonbeams.

(where did that come from?!

)

Someone else ask a question...

Willow Oran · 08-15-2002, 02:24 AM

You still haven't answered how long it would take to get them drunk, let's say that they release 10% of the alchohol from their systems every half an hour.

Laurelyn · 08-15-2002, 06:29 PM

Well, it would take exactly however much time it took for them to drink enough wine to get them drunk. Wouldn't it?

If the Orcs suddenly decdided to go on strike because of lousy working conditions (aka Mordor) what would have happened?
Before answering, consider the following:

1- All of Sauron's Orcs stopped work at daybreak the day they were supposed to attack Gondor.
2- They said if Sauron failed to pay them more and get them a better workplace they would be forced to help the Ringbearer's quest
3-They wanted to be paid the Orc equivalent of 1 million dollars a day
4- Sauron is broke

Claenoic · 08-15-2002, 06:55 PM

I'm guessing, while Sauron was trying to get all the orcs calm, Gondor would take over Barad-dur, Frodo and Sam would be treated like kings on the way to Mount Doom, and chickens would squack on a random hobbit farm.

What if Lothlorien elves suddenly started to call Galadriel's mirror a Birdbath? Please consider the following,

1. Galadriel just woke up.

2. Celeborn's still in bed because of a hangover from last night's party (don't ask).

3. And rabid penguins are stealing galadriel88's sanity faster then usual.

Treebeard's apprentice · 08-15-2002, 08:34 PM

Galadriel would banish all birds from Middle Earth, causing massive ecological disruption. Bird-hunters would be completely out of business and worms would infest all the land.

Meanwhile, Galadriel would be put on trial because the people believe she shouldn't have the power to order such a decree. A Lothlorien Congress is established and they immediately pass a salary raise for themselves.

They also establish a law limiting Celeborn's alcohol consumption.

Christiana · 08-15-2002, 08:37 PM

while the rabid penguens are batheing,galadriel would push galadriel88 into the group of elves.Celeborn would walk into his wife,and theydfall into the fountain.

Willow Oran · 08-16-2002, 10:17 PM

Does Lothlorien get soliciters?

and

What would the ringbearers, (Frodo, Bilbo, Elrond, Galadriel, and Gandalf), do if, while sailing west their ship sunk and they were stranded on an iceberg with a seal, two red and silver penguins, and a family of evil maniacal pink fluffy killer bunnies?

Claenoic · 08-17-2002, 06:12 PM

Solicitors are evil, therefore, none of them can enter Lorien.

The clock would strike noon. And rabid penguins would go moo.

08-09-2002, 12:17 AM	#81
Faramir Elven Warrior Join Date: May 2002 Location: Ithilien Posts: 353	This is a strange but funny thread. __________________ This is the Window of the Sunset, Henneth Annun, fairest of all the falls of Ithilien, land of many fountains."-Faramir, Chapter IV, The Two Towers ========================== FRODO LIVES!!! ========================== YODA IS DA MAN!!! ========================== I Love Jesus!

08-09-2002, 09:14 PM	#82
Christiana Elf Lord Join Date: May 2002 Location: Searching desperately for a swan boat to take to Valinor Posts: 1,231	hmm...could the istari wed? __________________ I take full responsibility for my actions, except for those that are somebody else's fault Having someone to blame is nearly as good as having a solution to the problem Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you are a mile away from them, and you habe their shoes. ~Frieda Norris

08-10-2002, 03:40 PM	#84
Christiana Elf Lord Join Date: May 2002 Location: Searching desperately for a swan boat to take to Valinor Posts: 1,231	lol! __________________ I take full responsibility for my actions, except for those that are somebody else's fault Having someone to blame is nearly as good as having a solution to the problem Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you are a mile away from them, and you habe their shoes. ~Frieda Norris

08-10-2002, 06:08 PM	#86
Christiana Elf Lord Join Date: May 2002 Location: Searching desperately for a swan boat to take to Valinor Posts: 1,231	easy!there r:the werewolves! __________________ I take full responsibility for my actions, except for those that are somebody else's fault Having someone to blame is nearly as good as having a solution to the problem Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you are a mile away from them, and you habe their shoes. ~Frieda Norris

08-10-2002, 06:22 PM	#87
Claenoic Queen of Prolonged, Unexplained Absences Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: Texas. 'Nuff said. Posts: 556	Discuss what would happen if 4 hobbits, a spork, Shelob's great aunt, and a piece of corn-on-the-cob was placed in an arena. __________________ Very Biased Alternate Script (but it's funny!):Click here! FREAK RAIN!!!!!!!! O.o Queen of prolonged unexplained absences and long, loooong car rides. Well, hullo everyone. As you can see, I don't hang out here muchly anymore. There's a good reason for this. Y'see, I've been hanging out at a different chatboard called Cardboardia. So far, I've been havin' a blast. Not that I don't love the TLA, but the magic of Entmoot is lost on me. So, as soon as TLA ends, so will my existance here, probably. Who knows though? I might stay. Highly unlikely however. This is a good bye in advance, then. Unless you want to join me and my group of friends at Cardboardia. Cheers!

08-10-2002, 02:20 PM	#83
*azalea* Long lost mooter Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: Florida Posts: 3,342	Only each other.

08-10-2002, 03:55 PM	#85
Menelvagor Elf Lord Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: lurking on the edge of conversations Posts: 924	Why is there never any mention of poodles in Middle Earth?

08-10-2002, 06:41 PM	#88
Christiana Elf Lord Join Date: May 2002 Location: Searching desperately for a swan boat to take to Valinor Posts: 1,231	while the hobbits were eating the corn,sga would skewer them w/ the spork and eat them! __________________ I take full responsibility for my actions, except for those that are somebody else's fault Having someone to blame is nearly as good as having a solution to the problem Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you are a mile away from them, and you habe their shoes. ~Frieda Norris

08-14-2002, 12:54 AM	#89
Willow Oran Deus Ex Machina Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: Seattle Posts: 1,951	Oooh! Random questions, fun! How many bottles of wine does it take to get a gathering of 100 elves drunk if the wine has 50% alchohol content and the elves have tolerances ranging from medium to high? __________________ "5. Plain Rings with RUNES on the inside. Avoid these like the PLAGUE. -Diana Wynne Jones Tough Guide To FantasyLand ...it's not much of a show if somebody doesn't suffer, and preferably at length. Suffering is beautiful in any case, and so is anguish; but as for loathing, and bitterness... I don't think they belong on the stage at all. - Isabella, I Gelosi

08-14-2002, 08:05 PM	#90
Treebeard's apprentice Elven Warrior Join Date: Nov 2001 Location: Wherever I may roam Posts: 207	50% alcohol content!!!? That's some wicked strong stuff. To answer the question, though, I think we should need to find out the rate at which the elves would release the alcohol from their systems. In other words: How do elves go to the bathroom and how many times an hour/ day/ week, and whatnot?

08-14-2002, 11:35 PM	#91
TinuvielChild Padawan Join Date: Feb 2002 Location: The Barony of Carolingia Posts: 2,176	Well, the Lothlorien elves merely pee off the edges of their talans, and that's how they water the grass! Sick, I know. How is it that the elves could commit massive acts of incest and not end up with genetically defective children? __________________ There are only four questions of value in life: What is sacred? Of what is the spirit made? What is worth living for? What is worth dying for? The answer to each is the same: ONLY LOVE. Dance as though nobody's watching. Sing as though nobody's listening. Dream as though you'll live forever. Live as though you'll die tomorrow. EIDRIORCQWSDAKLMEDDCWWTIWOATTOPWFIO and proud! FRODO LIVES!!!!!

08-14-2002, 11:44 PM	#92
Christiana Elf Lord Join Date: May 2002 Location: Searching desperately for a swan boat to take to Valinor Posts: 1,231	example? __________________ I take full responsibility for my actions, except for those that are somebody else's fault Having someone to blame is nearly as good as having a solution to the problem Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you are a mile away from them, and you habe their shoes. ~Frieda Norris

08-15-2002, 12:56 AM	#93
Menelvagor Elf Lord Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: lurking on the edge of conversations Posts: 924	Easy. elves don't have DNA, they are made up of a mixture of chocolate pudding and moonbeams. (where did that come from?! ) Someone else ask a question...

08-15-2002, 02:24 AM	#94
Willow Oran Deus Ex Machina Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: Seattle Posts: 1,951	You still haven't answered how long it would take to get them drunk, let's say that they release 10% of the alchohol from their systems every half an hour. __________________ "5. Plain Rings with RUNES on the inside. Avoid these like the PLAGUE. -Diana Wynne Jones Tough Guide To FantasyLand ...it's not much of a show if somebody doesn't suffer, and preferably at length. Suffering is beautiful in any case, and so is anguish; but as for loathing, and bitterness... I don't think they belong on the stage at all. - Isabella, I Gelosi

08-15-2002, 06:29 PM	#95
Laurelyn Elf Lord Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: Valinor, right next to Telperion . . . what did you expect, Michigan? Posts: 1,315	Well, it would take exactly however much time it took for them to drink enough wine to get them drunk. Wouldn't it? If the Orcs suddenly decdided to go on strike because of lousy working conditions (aka Mordor) what would have happened? Before answering, consider the following: 1- All of Sauron's Orcs stopped work at daybreak the day they were supposed to attack Gondor. 2- They said if Sauron failed to pay them more and get them a better workplace they would be forced to help the Ringbearer's quest 3-They wanted to be paid the Orc equivalent of 1 million dollars a day 4- Sauron is broke __________________ The Third Age of Entmoot has begun. Angel of music, guide and guardian! Grant to me your glory! The country I eat and spend the day in is by no means the country I sleep and dream in. Define patriotism. Hold the boat, you spastic monkey! ~ Elenka

08-15-2002, 06:55 PM	#96
Claenoic Queen of Prolonged, Unexplained Absences Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: Texas. 'Nuff said. Posts: 556	I'm guessing, while Sauron was trying to get all the orcs calm, Gondor would take over Barad-dur, Frodo and Sam would be treated like kings on the way to Mount Doom, and chickens would squack on a random hobbit farm. What if Lothlorien elves suddenly started to call Galadriel's mirror a Birdbath? Please consider the following, 1. Galadriel just woke up. 2. Celeborn's still in bed because of a hangover from last night's party (don't ask). 3. And rabid penguins are stealing galadriel88's sanity faster then usual. __________________ Very Biased Alternate Script (but it's funny!):Click here! FREAK RAIN!!!!!!!! O.o Queen of prolonged unexplained absences and long, loooong car rides. Well, hullo everyone. As you can see, I don't hang out here muchly anymore. There's a good reason for this. Y'see, I've been hanging out at a different chatboard called Cardboardia. So far, I've been havin' a blast. Not that I don't love the TLA, but the magic of Entmoot is lost on me. So, as soon as TLA ends, so will my existance here, probably. Who knows though? I might stay. Highly unlikely however. This is a good bye in advance, then. Unless you want to join me and my group of friends at Cardboardia. Cheers!

08-15-2002, 08:34 PM	#97
Treebeard's apprentice Elven Warrior Join Date: Nov 2001 Location: Wherever I may roam Posts: 207	Galadriel would banish all birds from Middle Earth, causing massive ecological disruption. Bird-hunters would be completely out of business and worms would infest all the land. Meanwhile, Galadriel would be put on trial because the people believe she shouldn't have the power to order such a decree. A Lothlorien Congress is established and they immediately pass a salary raise for themselves. They also establish a law limiting Celeborn's alcohol consumption.

08-15-2002, 08:37 PM	#98
Christiana Elf Lord Join Date: May 2002 Location: Searching desperately for a swan boat to take to Valinor Posts: 1,231	while the rabid penguens are batheing,galadriel would push galadriel88 into the group of elves.Celeborn would walk into his wife,and theydfall into the fountain. __________________ I take full responsibility for my actions, except for those that are somebody else's fault Having someone to blame is nearly as good as having a solution to the problem Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you are a mile away from them, and you habe their shoes. ~Frieda Norris

08-16-2002, 10:17 PM	#99
Willow Oran Deus Ex Machina Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: Seattle Posts: 1,951	Does Lothlorien get soliciters? and What would the ringbearers, (Frodo, Bilbo, Elrond, Galadriel, and Gandalf), do if, while sailing west their ship sunk and they were stranded on an iceberg with a seal, two red and silver penguins, and a family of evil maniacal pink fluffy killer bunnies? __________________ "5. Plain Rings with RUNES on the inside. Avoid these like the PLAGUE. -Diana Wynne Jones Tough Guide To FantasyLand ...it's not much of a show if somebody doesn't suffer, and preferably at length. Suffering is beautiful in any case, and so is anguish; but as for loathing, and bitterness... I don't think they belong on the stage at all. - Isabella, I Gelosi

08-17-2002, 06:12 PM	#100
Claenoic Queen of Prolonged, Unexplained Absences Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: Texas. 'Nuff said. Posts: 556	Solicitors are evil, therefore, none of them can enter Lorien. The clock would strike noon. And rabid penguins would go moo. __________________ Very Biased Alternate Script (but it's funny!):Click here! FREAK RAIN!!!!!!!! O.o Queen of prolonged unexplained absences and long, loooong car rides. Well, hullo everyone. As you can see, I don't hang out here muchly anymore. There's a good reason for this. Y'see, I've been hanging out at a different chatboard called Cardboardia. So far, I've been havin' a blast. Not that I don't love the TLA, but the magic of Entmoot is lost on me. So, as soon as TLA ends, so will my existance here, probably. Who knows though? I might stay. Highly unlikely however. This is a good bye in advance, then. Unless you want to join me and my group of friends at Cardboardia. Cheers!