NEW! the memoirs of hectorberlioz

[BeardofPants]

Oh shaddup spock. Been a while since we had a nice fun thread, neh?
*wonders if she should resurrect one of the old ones like the 'moot swimsuit
Hows about it - A Spock swimsuit edition?

[Spock]

Wacks BOP with a dead fish. El Crappola, IMO.

[hectorberlioz]

Originally Posted by Lotesse

Can't wait to see you pop in to the Other Place.

You mean in Hell?! ...............

[hectorberlioz]

Originally Posted by Eärniel

Whatcha think, should we sue?

You can't, I put a notice at the top warning of the contents


THESE were by far my favorite bits...(I'm assuming everyone read the "Secret" Letters...those are some of the best.)

"Secret” Letter no.5, From PYRO to…X
Dear X,
I just told Jonathan the pathetic lie that should set things in motion for complete takeover. I know, he’s such a simpleton isn’t he? All those Scandinavians are. That’s what they have in common with that other inferior race: Canadians.
Hector is the first to go down…


“Secret” Letter no.8 (supposedly from Jonathan to Earniel)
Hey. You’ll be getting a letter soon. Huh. Ignore it.
Well. I’ve got to go.
p.s. let’s go away or something.


“Secret” Letter no.9 (supposedly from Earniel in response)
O Darling! Your romantic, intellectual language is enough to sweep any woman off her feet! Too bad for those women that they no longer have feet! Can you guess why? *chuckles naughtily, revs up her chainsaw*

[hectorberlioz]

Originally Posted by BeardofPants

I never voted for you pipsqueak.
Wait, I did, but only because I didn't wanna vote for JD
So, which is the lie? Which is the truth? You'll neeeever know, cos all I do is lie.

Ah, you're too embarassed to say you did, because then people might know you had a smart side to you

[hectorberlioz]

Originally Posted by Mercutio

HB, you cannot forget the mix-ups involving me: your wife? girlfriend? sister? No one will ever know...

EDIT: PYRO--I'd competely forgotten

Darn it, you're right! I forgot all about that...it would make a great added bit.

Originally Posted by Finrod Felagund

Very nice Hector. Though 'd like to say, I slung little to no mud during the presidential campaign, and also did not vote for myself (voted fot Jonathan.)

I liked it though...I should give it a try too.

Well you should have told me!! I would have canonized you a saint too!
By the way, go for it , I'm looking forward to hearing the truth about you and SGH

[inked]

Tsk, tsk, tsk, HB. You left out way too much. Tell us the "real truth" that we all want to know, you know, the "inquiring minds" stuff. Like, BoP is really an alien agent sent to lure earthlings to their doom by pants-removal as a sytemic approach to life. And, why did JD really leave the 'Moot? Come on, don't hold back!!!!!!!!!!

[hectorberlioz]

Originally Posted by inked

Tsk, tsk, tsk, HB. You left out way too much. Tell us the "real truth" that we all want to know, you know, the "inquiring minds" stuff. Like, BoP is really an alien agent sent to lure earthlings to their doom by pants-removal as a sytemic approach to life. And, why did JD really leave the 'Moot? Come on, don't hold back!!!!!!!!!!

You've nabbed me Inked, I'm not sure about BoP, but there is plenty to say about JD. It's just that I'm WAY too nice.

[Lizra]

Ok...."pervier"......it's cool

[Finrod Felagund]

Originally Posted by hectorberlioz

By the way, go for it , I'm looking forward to hearing the truth about you and SGH

Doesn't everyone?

All in due time...

BTW, is there no post limit here? Or did you get a special posting privilege for that one?

[hectorberlioz]

Originally Posted by Finrod Felagund

Doesn't everyone?

All in due time...

BTW, is there no post limit here? Or did you get a special posting privilege for that one?

I think the new rule is that first posts can be as long as desired, but anything after is under the rule.

[hectorberlioz]

A number of revisions and additions have ben edited into the memoirs if anyone feels like going over it again

[Mercutio]

hb- **** also played the french horn, remember? And he loved Debussy, hated Berlioz...there were some harsh word there


Also, at some point people thought you and I were the same person.

[klatukatt]

Wait, I ran as Finrod's VP? (I mean Katt_knome_hobbit.)

Dang, I can't remember that.

I didn't know there was so much cruelty on the board. What cave have I been living in?

[hectorberlioz]

Originally Posted by klatukatt

Wait, I ran as Finrod's VP? (I mean Katt_knome_hobbit.)

Dang, I can't remember that.

I didn't know there was so much cruelty on the board. What cave have I been living in?

A nice one apperantly. How could you fail to see the real world otherwise?

Originally Posted by Mercutio

hb- **** also played the french horn, remember? And he loved Debussy, hated Berlioz...there were some harsh word there


Also, at some point people thought you and I were the same person.

I put that last bit in there...Twista Twista...I wonder where he went to? He was a nice mooter to have around.

of course **** could ONLY play an "french" instrument, that Debussy-loving, Berlioz-hating brat

[hectorberlioz]

Originally Posted by Spock

This is #@$!@#$.

Why do you say that?

[trolls' bane]

Originally Posted by inked

Tsk, tsk, tsk, HB. You left out way too much. Tell us the "real truth" that we all want to know, you know, the "inquiring minds" stuff. Like, BoP is really an alien agent sent to lure earthlings to their doom by pants-removal as a sytemic approach to life. And, why did JD really leave the 'Moot? Come on, don't hold back!!!!!!!!!!

Well, I'd like to know why any big-time mooter would say "Goodbye." Where's the sense in that? "I'm moving on..." Holy Saint Eduardino Vincent Neutrino Aufanalamafudgieymatchitchaanalamachaeerrio de Pinon Pines the XXVI! Now what can I do to outdo you?


Now here's the post I wrote up in my Palm Pilot after reading the memoirs:
Hector, these are great! Superb!
Now I have to go buy nine picture frames, thanks to you. You owe me one--no, you will now owe me about $33.95 plus tax and bus fare for a round-trip ride to Wal-Mart.
That bit about Wagner was exquisitely insulting. I want to meet this Mr. X. What'll it be? A dark alley, a gravel pit, or a maritime abandoned boat dock-turned-landfill with a secret criminal lair hidden in a rotting warehouse? Hmm, maybe so... *begins to clean the mirrors on a gargantuan Martian OptoSonic Engineering Corporation arm-mounted BRTD-1126 Gamma-Blaster portable lasing system*
Who is "E"? Who is "PYRO"?
Do you plan on adding more? Well, DO ya, punk?
It appears that I was out of the loop for all of these good times. No fair! I've been mooting longer than you! I have a month's more experience!
Eh, when I was yer age, I was exactly like ah am now. The important thing was... *dozes off for a second*--Gnuh! Where was I? Oh--Well, the important thing was that I had an onion on my belt.
I liked Jonathan's whole BTB and ATB (Before Trolls' Bane and After Trolls' Bane, as used in thr Reminiscing thread). It would make a good conspiracy, though one I'll have to let someone else concoct.
Ooo. I think you're word processor needs an attitude adjusment. I'd be happy to help... *straps titanic laser to arm and large power pack to back* *flips several switches and laser makes a whirring, hissing sound*

[durinsbane2244]

wow...that was cool...but shouldn't you have mentioned that time that you were hanging from a cliff by your ingrown toenail and i teleported magically across the globe to save you with a drunken-lepruchaun-spider-monkey? that was interesting... ...i thought it was...

[trolls' bane]

Originally Posted by durinsbane2244

wow...that was cool...but shouldn't you have mentioned that time that you were hanging from a cliff by your ingrown toenail and i teleported magically across the globe to save you with a drunken-lepruchaun-spider-monkey? that was interesting... ...i thought it was...

Oo! That's the kind of stuff I want to hear. And the kind of stuff that would make my cousin want to read it (perhaps as an insentive to join Entmoot?).

[durinsbane2244]

well...tell hector to get crackin' on all those times i saved his life AND financial situation...need i bring up that little time he tried out the american stock market in 1929...