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12-11-2005, 07:53 PM
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#1 | |
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Ring-smith
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: Either walking across Rohan or riding through Fangorn forest
Posts: 2,000
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Star wars funnys
This is like "They'd never say that!" but for Star wars.
Here's my first one: (A lot of "Princess bride" cross-overs) __________________ (Luke Skywalker and Darth Vader are standing on a brige) Luke:I am luke skywalker, you killed my father, prepare to die! Vader:No luke, I AM your father! Luke:NNNOOOOO!!! (Luke and vader go at each other useing their left hands and Vaders hand is cut off) Vader:You got me, but there's something you should know, I'M NOT LEFT HANDED! (Vader puts his saber in his right hand) Luke:Not anymore anyway. (Luke and Vader go at it again, this time lukes hand is cut off) Vader:Now surrender to the dark side of the force! Why are you smileing? Luke:I know something you don't know. Vader:What is it? Luke:I'm not left handed ether! (Luke puts his saber in his right hand) Luke:HA! __________________ So what do you think? Post your own! (And don't laugh about the "Princess bride" stuff, it's not as girly a movie as it sounds, and I asume the book it was based on was good too)
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My status: Novice avatar maker. Elf lord Has no authority whatsoever Master of messing up
Thread killer  Ring smith   Merry Christmas! They'd never say that (Part 2) What happened to the dragon? |
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12-11-2005, 09:48 PM
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#2 |
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Dreamweaver
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: The Misty Mountains, where the spirits go...
Posts: 3,560
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as a matter of fact, the princess bride rocks, and the book is awesome too...anyway...those are pretty funny...
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Lord, what fools these mortals be! ---------------- We are the music-makers, And we are the dreamers of dreams, Wandering by lone sea-breakers, And sitting by desolate streams; World-losers and world-forsakers, On whom the pale moon gleams: Yet we are the movers and shakers Of the world for ever, it seems. ---------------- Shanti, shanti, shantih... |
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12-11-2005, 10:35 PM
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#3 |
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Entmoot Secretary of the Treasury
Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: Campsite-by-Giraffe
Posts: 5,408
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Luke Skywalker (to the Rebels): You bishwagging Rimkin Sithspawn! I'll see you in hell! *kills everyone on Hoth*
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KI6PFA Amateur Radio Operator  |
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12-11-2005, 10:37 PM
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#4 |
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Entmoot Secretary of the Treasury
Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: Campsite-by-Giraffe
Posts: 5,408
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*Darth Vader enters the Death Star II on his shuttle*
Commander (to Stormtrooper): Check it out! I didn't realize the circus was in town!
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KI6PFA Amateur Radio Operator |
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12-12-2005, 12:09 PM
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#5 | ||
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Friendly Neigborhood Sith Lord
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: USA
Posts: 2,080
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Bothan: will you take the deathstar plans?
Mon Mothma: instead of an emperor you would have a queen, NOT DARK BUT BEAUTIFUL, TERRIBLE AS THE DAWN TREACHEROUS AS THE SEA!! ALL WILL LOOK UPON ME AND ...DESSPAIRR! Bothan: EEK! go easy on the caffeine will ya.
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I was Press Secretary for the Berlioz administration and also, but not limited to, owner and co operator of fully armed and operational battle station EDDIE Quote:
Quote:
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12-12-2005, 04:36 PM
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#6 | |
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Ring-smith
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: Either walking across Rohan or riding through Fangorn forest
Posts: 2,000
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funny...
__________________ Obi-wan:I just give up! You can do what you want ani... Anikin/Darth Vader:That's Darth Vader to you! __________________ Sidious:BEWARE THE DARK SIDE OF THE FORCE!!! Ewok:? Sidious:NOW GET OUT OF MY WAY EWOK!!! (The ewok uses force lightning on Sidious  )__________________ (On board the falcon were Obi is training luke) Obi-wan:Use the force luke! (Luke skywalker decapitates Obi-wan) Han:EEK!!! DEAD BODY!!! Luke:Huh? Were? (Removes helmet and sees Obi-wans head) Luke:Cool... Han:What? "Cool"?!? I'll show you "cool"!!! (Han shoots Mr. skywalker) Han:Another dead body! EEK!!! Chewie:Snap out of it man!!! Han:What? "Snap out of it"?!? I'll show you "Snap out of it"!!! __________________ (At the geonosis arnea) Obi-wan:There's only one thing to do at a time like this, SEND IN THE CLOWNS! (Yoda shows up with the clones) Obi-wan:I sayed clowns, but clones will work. __________________ Yoda:My pressouss... THEY STOLE IT FROM USSSS!!! __________________ Obi-wan:I've lost my mind!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! Marvin:Perfectly awful, isn't it? C3-PO:Where did you come from? Marvin:An improbability field I suspect. __________________ Yoda:Now that the empire is shatered, I CAN TAKE OVER THE GALIXY!!! __________________ Leia:I right, I give up! I wasn't on a diplomadic mission this time vader. __________________ Jar-jar:I am now a sith! I AM NOW DARTH JAR-JAR!!! Obi-wan:AAAA!!! Anikin:Oh yeah? (Darth Jar-jar and Anikin fight and anikin is killed) Darth Jar-jar:HA NOW MESA KILL MY MASTER!!! Sidious:What? ME?!?! Darth Jar-jar:YES! YOUSA!!! (Darth Jar-jar kills Sidious) (A little cat walks up) Cat:Meow. Darth Jar-jar:Go away little kittysa! Cat:MEOW?!? (The cat takes out a lightsaber and it and Jar-jar fight.) Cat:MEOW MEOW MEOW! (Darth Jar-jar gets cut in two) Cat:Now all the sith are dead, my task is done. (Cat walks up to Obi-wan) Obi-wan:AAAWWWWWWWWWW!!! CUTE LITTLE CAT-CAT!!! __________________ Obi-wan would never make faces at yoda at the councal __________________ I'm done for now.
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My status: Novice avatar maker. Elf lord Has no authority whatsoever Master of messing up
Thread killer Ring smith Merry Christmas! They'd never say that (Part 2) What happened to the dragon? |
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12-13-2005, 10:55 PM
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#7 |
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Elf Lord
Join Date: Dec 2000
Location: Fountain Valley, CA
Posts: 6,343
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The punchline to the last one was quite funny
 . Leia: Luke, don't talk that way! You have a power I . . . I don't understand, and could never have! Luke: You're wrong, Leia. You have that power too. In time, you'll learn to use it as I have. The Force is strong in my family. I have it. My father has it . . . and . . . my sister has it. Leia (Luke Skywalker voice, from Bespin): NOOOOOOO!!!!!! NOOO!!! Luke: What? What is it? Leia: (Sob) . . . but that means . . . Darth Vader's my father . . . (Sob, hiccup)
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If the world has indeed, as I have said, been built of sorrow, it has been built by the hands of love, because in no other way could the soul of man, for whom the world was made, reach the full stature of its perfection. ~Oscar Wilde, written from prison Oscar Wilde's last words: "Either the wallpaper goes, or I do." Last edited by Lief Erikson : 12-13-2005 at 10:56 PM. |
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12-14-2005, 06:36 AM
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#8 |
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Cardboard Harp of Gondor 
Join Date: Sep 2001
Location: IM IN UR POSTZ, EDITIN' UR WURDZ
Posts: 6,433
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Leia: Oh, I can't restrain myself another minute! I've tried and tried in vain to hide my feelings... *grabs Han's jacket* Now kiss me, you scruffy hunk!
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12-15-2005, 01:04 AM
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#9 | |
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Entmoot Secretary of the Treasury
Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: Campsite-by-Giraffe
Posts: 5,408
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Quote:
Man: "Deep in the human unconcscious is a pervasive need for a logical universe that makes sense. But the real universe is always one step beyond logic." Kyle Katarn: "What?" Man: "How often it is that the angry man rages denial of what his inner self is telling him." Kyle: "Now you die!" *cuts off head and kills everyone he ever meets, eventually being the only person left in the galaxy* Man: "There is no escape--We pay for the violence of our ancestors." Kyle: "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAA!"  
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KI6PFA Amateur Radio Operator |
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12-14-2005, 09:17 AM
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#10 | |
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Ring-smith
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: Either walking across Rohan or riding through Fangorn forest
Posts: 2,000
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Han:MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!
Jar-jar:We're sopost to be tousands of years before the time the star wars movies came out. Han:So... what does that have to do with Christmas? Jar-jar:The birth of christ took place less than 2000 years before the first star wars movie came out, so we wouldn't celibrate christmas, christ hasn't being born yet at this point in time. Han:...So I can't say "Merry Christmas"? Jar-jar:You can say it, it just wont meen anything. Han:Bah-humbug. Jar-jar:And the Christmas Carol was writen less than 200 years before the first star wars movie came out. Han:AAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGG!!!
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My status: Novice avatar maker. Elf lord Has no authority whatsoever Master of messing up
Thread killer Ring smith Merry Christmas! They'd never say that (Part 2) What happened to the dragon? |
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12-15-2005, 12:24 AM
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#11 |
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Fenway Ranger, Lord of Red Sox Nation
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: College!
Posts: 1,976
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Going from the first post's theme:
Luke(Bespin City): Hello, my name is Luke Skywalker. You killed my father. Prepare to die. Vader: Umm...sorry to disappoint you, but...
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Adventure...betrayal...heroism... Atharon: where heroes are born. My wife once said to me—when I'd been writing for ten or fifteen years—that I could always go back to being a nuclear engineer. And I said to her, 'Harriet, would you let someone who quit his job to go write fantasy anywhere near your nuclear reactor? I wouldn't!' (Robert Jordan) |
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01-07-2006, 02:07 AM
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#12 | |
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Elven Warrior
Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: Arthedian
Posts: 460
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Quote:
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"Can you feel her, running through your veins? She will always live forever!" ~ Atreyu [Her portrait in Black] "I want to see pretty people doing ugly things..." ~ Unknown "Damn it n' such!" ~ Stewie Griffen |
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01-08-2006, 09:14 PM
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#13 |
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Dreamweaver
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: The Misty Mountains, where the spirits go...
Posts: 3,560
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not necessarily, see, this galaxy "far far away" could have been around longer than ours or just be more advanced so that long ago that's where they were and now they're even more advanced...
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Lord, what fools these mortals be! ---------------- We are the music-makers, And we are the dreamers of dreams, Wandering by lone sea-breakers, And sitting by desolate streams; World-losers and world-forsakers, On whom the pale moon gleams: Yet we are the movers and shakers Of the world for ever, it seems. ---------------- Shanti, shanti, shantih... |
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01-09-2006, 01:59 AM
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#14 |
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Elven Warrior
Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: Arthedian
Posts: 460
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Well I'm not saying that the galaxy in question is ours in the future, I'm just saying that we don't know when it was or where it was, it could be our galaxy in the past!? Or maybe it is coinciding with our current galaxy somewhere else?!
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"Can you feel her, running through your veins? She will always live forever!" ~ Atreyu [Her portrait in Black] "I want to see pretty people doing ugly things..." ~ Unknown "Damn it n' such!" ~ Stewie Griffen |
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01-09-2006, 08:19 PM
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#15 |
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Fenway Ranger, Lord of Red Sox Nation
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: College!
Posts: 1,976
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Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!! Brain Meltdown!!!!
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Adventure...betrayal...heroism... Atharon: where heroes are born. My wife once said to me—when I'd been writing for ten or fifteen years—that I could always go back to being a nuclear engineer. And I said to her, 'Harriet, would you let someone who quit his job to go write fantasy anywhere near your nuclear reactor? I wouldn't!' (Robert Jordan) |
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01-16-2006, 07:28 PM
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#16 | |
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Entmoot Secretary of the Treasury
Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: Campsite-by-Giraffe
Posts: 5,408
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Quote:
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KI6PFA Amateur Radio Operator |
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12-15-2005, 12:07 PM
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#17 | |
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Ring-smith
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: Either walking across Rohan or riding through Fangorn forest
Posts: 2,000
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Darth vader:Luke, I am your aunts second cusens uncles friends brother!
__________________ Not to repeat myself but here's another few Star Wars/ Princess bride cross overs. __________________ Luke:Hello, I am luke Skywalker, you killed my father, prepare to die! Darth vader:No luke, I... AM YOUR FATHER!!! Luke:Are we reading the same script? __________________ Luke:Hello, I am luke Skywalker, you killed my father, prepare to die! Darth vader:No luke, I... AM YOUR FATHER!!! Marvin:Auful, isn't it? Kermit the frog:What are you doing here? Marvin:I think someone is useing an improbabilty drive without shields. Croc hunter:You got that right! Big bird:Hello, can you tell me how to get back to sesame street? I'm lost! Dorthy:I don't think we're in Kanses anymore! Gollum:LOST!!! THE PRESSOUSS ISS LOST!!! AND SO ISS USSSSS!!!! Monty python some thing monty pythonish, i've never seen it)Mr. Smith:Hello Ms. Gale.(Dorthey) Philis fog:I think we're lost pasportue! Big bird:Oh, look there's a police officer! I'm lost so I should ask him. (Big bird walks up to Sgt, Joe friday) Sgt. Friday:What am I doing here? My little sister:What did I do wrong? How did I get here?!? Larry the cucumber(Dressed as aragorn):If you put this on right it'll even protect your ears! Curly:Woopwoopwoopwoop woop... woop! Morphous:The matrix has you Big bird! Smog: How did I get here? I though I was dead!__________________ Gotta go, sorry, I'll contenue this later...
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My status: Novice avatar maker. Elf lord Has no authority whatsoever Master of messing up
Thread killer Ring smith Merry Christmas! They'd never say that (Part 2) What happened to the dragon? Last edited by me9996 : 12-15-2005 at 12:10 PM. |
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12-15-2005, 12:23 PM
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#18 | |
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Elf Lord
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: Mirkwood, well actually I live in North-west Scania, Sweden
Posts: 9,481
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Quote:
Read and enjoy! http://entmoot.tolkientrail.com/showthread.php?t=4834 |
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12-16-2005, 05:55 PM
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#19 | |
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Ring-smith
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: Either walking across Rohan or riding through Fangorn forest
Posts: 2,000
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Thanks for showing me that Grey_Wolf! But I think I kill the thread
P.S. Posting this right after posting something in the teacup cafe' IV... not good for some reson.
__________________
My status: Novice avatar maker. Elf lord Has no authority whatsoever Master of messing up
Thread killer Ring smith Merry Christmas! They'd never say that (Part 2) What happened to the dragon? |
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12-16-2005, 06:28 PM
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#20 |
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Hobbit in the Music
Join Date: Nov 1999
Location: Westmarch
Posts: 1,111
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I've always liked this joke:
Darth Vader: (menacingly) Luke, I know what you're getting for Christmas. Luke: (in agony) HOOOOoooooowww? Darth Vader: I felt your presents. |
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